Sibling is refusing to sign for son to be appointed executor until she receives 2 years of bank statements. Over the years, mom was adamant that her finances were her business and trusted her son. Can sibling request through legal channels the bank statements of the joint account (NYS)
If the son is NAMED the executor of the will then he IS the executor of the will and whether you sign something or not doesn't matter at ALL. If there IS no executor of the will then one will be appointed as "Administrator" which is what an executor is called when appointed to a person who died intestate (without a will). Any silly family member wanting to open a squabble around it will find that the state will HAPPILY assign a Fiduciary of the court to "administer the estate" and that will cost EASILY one third OF the Estate. So if you wish to make trouble, go for it, and lose all the money.
Back to the account. The account was likely held by both your mom and her son. If so, then the account BELONGS TO THE SON AND THE SON ONLY on her death. So you can't make any trouble THERE at all. If you wish to see who now holds this account you can certainly go to the bank and ask, tho you are very likely to get no private and personal information.
Wanting still to try to make waves? Welcome to it. An Elder Law attorney, so recently about 400.00 an hour, now cost 700 an hour or so. Find one you like lots, because he will be certain you see him often and pay up front.
I am truly sorry. I am so tired of squabbling families. Just tell me that your brother, her son, the holder of this account, wasn't ALSO the son who took care of her. Because if you tell me THAT I am likely to get even more mean.
Likely your hubby is settling your mother's affairs after her death, and will have an attorney. He can confirm this with both YOUR BANKER and the attorney. This money is his.
I’ll never understand why people get so mean and nasty when a relative dies. It serves a reminder, yet again, to be sure you have all of your estate planning done, documented and a trusted person named who will manage everything once you have died.
Best of luck with everything.
What is this about? Does this mean that your Mom didn't have a Will so there is no named Executor and now the estate is in probate and your husband (her son and prior caregiver) has applied to be the court-appointed Executor?
Can she hold up the closing of your Mom's estate final affairs?
I don't remember my brothers having to sign anything for me to be Executor. I was named in the Will as executor. I filed the Will and received a short certificate to handle Moms estate.
If MIL died without a Will then someone needs to file to be an Administrator. Maybe in that scenario siblings must sign that they will not contest the assignment?
IMO, this is not the time to contest anything. That is done at the accounting when its showed how the estate was handled. Bills that need to be paid. Debits and credits. Thats when a beneficiary can contest the findings.
Me, if you can get 2 yrs of statements together, do it, My Moms showed her SS coming in and her bills going out.