As caregivers/helpers, we’re already dealing with un-ending stress. Add to that people we bump into who get on our nerves:
What kind of people get on your nerves?
It can help to let it out. For me, it’s rude people. And people who do things behind your back.
I didn't know you knew my mother LOL. I honestly don't think she's said a truthful thing about me since I was a baby in the crib.
People who try to force their opinions onto you.
People who are mean, rude and lack understanding and compassion.
Oh, and I especially hate it when they think that they are helping instead of realizing that they are intruding on your personal life.
First of all, it usually doesn’t work!
Secondly, live and let live.
I am not referring to serious people who have serious issues that need a shoulder to lean on. I’m talking about people who complain about stupid crap. I just want to scream at them and say, ‘If this is your biggest problem, you have it made in the shade!’
Actually, sometimes I have told certain people that enough was enough, that I didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
I do tell them to shut up. Nobody wants to hear someone's negative complaining crap over and over.
Needing a shoulder to lean on is one thing, but that gets mighty old quick when the person doing the leaning refuses to help themsleves in any way.
One of my favorite actors Keanu Reeves dropped a real pearl of wisdom when he was a guest on the 'Tonight Show' about complaining.
He said:
"Eighty percent of people don't want to hear about your problems. The other twenty percent are happy you have them".
Entitled people. I am dumbfounded by the number of people who think societal norms or even common courtesies shouldn’t be expected from them. But expect them from others. Assumptions that their situation is always worse so they deserve special treatment or exceptions to rules.
Cut the line because you’re in a hurry? What makes you think everyone else isn’t in a hurry as well, or that your time is more valuable than theirs?
I warned you the floodgates had opened.
I'm referring here to people who are not my family.
I think the biggest problem is that my home is no longer feels like my private sanctuary. It's one thing to have people - strangers, really - in for a dinner party or whatnot, but quite another to have them in my home when I'm not here.
But. The biggest thing that grinds my gears is the fact that I - at 64 years old and always very independent - cannot go anywhere unless one of them is here. I hate that. Everything about that drives me to distraction.
Being at the mercy of someone else is the biggest irritation of my life.
I cringe when people can’t mind their own business, particularly when the worst train wrecks expect to impose their own awful advice.
I loathe people who tell me they’ve never been incorrect, and proclaim themselves to be geniuses in fields for which they have neither education, training nor experience. The moment I hear that I mentally halve their IQ.
I become terribly frustrated with people who cannot or refuse to learn, to change, to grow. “But we’ve always done it that way!” Or “Eeeew, you’ve changed!” Yes, I would hope so as I am older, thus more experienced, and have acquired new information. It sickens me the way we celebrate ignorance. That we trot out tradition as an excuse to be cruel. Empathy, kindness and wisdom seem in short supply.
If I see you (metaphorically or literally) hit someone when they’re down, I will think you’re weak.
I have a house full of company and am prepping for a big party. Otherwise I’d write volumes. I may be back. The floodgates have opened.
“am prepping for a big party. Otherwise I’d write volumes. I may be back. The floodgates have opened.”
Poodle, Need and I are currently writing Volume 6 OF Volume 6.
Have you ever wanted to secretly video or record someone? LOL 😆, just so they can see what they look and sound like.
My friend did exactly that before she divorced her idiotic husband! He kept denying things that he said and did.
So, one day she said to him, I have everything on video! Would you like to see it? He didn’t know what to say to her when he saw it.
A picture is worth a thousand words. There was no way for him to deny what he was doing!
He was such a fool. Not to mention hypocrite. He was sweet as pie in front of others. Behind closed doors, he was a monster!
You write volume 1, I will do volume 2 and then we can collaborate on volume 3! 😊
I knew someone who would NEVER admit they were wrong.
These types of people don't do well in any setting - be it private at home with one on one care where they burn out their caregivers with their demands - or in group care settings where they whine and pout and demand because they cannot fathom why everyone isn't dropping everything to see to their needs immediately and "what do you mean there are other people who need your help?"
Additionally - they will also attempt to engage other people to "make" caregivers do "better" when they feel they aren't getting the care they "deserve" - regardless of where they are getting the care from. They like their flying monkeys. And of course they also "deserve" better care than other people. Make no mistake.
Venting.
I am afraid the old adage that talks about grief being the result of reality our expectations minus reality is true.
Human beings simply aren't very nice animals. We do have big brains, and we CAN be empathetic, and that's about ALL there is good to say of us, but we are like any other animal, here for territory and breed rights before we die, and we will stop at nothing to get what we want.
Once it is accepted that we simply are not very sweet creatures, not even smart enough not to destroy our own environments (most simple viruses know better than THAT), it is easier to accept the daily travails.
For me when it goes poorly I basically shrug it off with "What did you expect, Al?" and when it goes well I am VERY happy.
People who only speak to you if they need something from you, but ignore you otherwise.
Me too. I have no use for a brown-nosing snitch that will throw a person under the bus because they think it will score them some points somewhere.
I don't have that problem with people only speaking to me when they need something. They just get told to go pound sand and I'm done.
☹️
I'm sure many have heard the workplace saying, yeah, the job would be great if there were no customers... :)
I wonder what your coworker would do if you allowed them to take over.
They may screw up horribly and it would show them that it serves everyone better when they work as part of the team.
If they fail as ‘the leader’ they may learn to respect you and ask for your input.
In judgmental situations: People that believe one side of someone's account of things, and judging the another person, without ever listening to the other sides version of accounts.
For an example:
Neighbor A talking to Neighbor B, about Neighbor C: Do you know neighbor C did such and such? Neighbor B's response should be "I can't really judge until I know Neighbor C's side of the story.
In most case it doesn't go like this.
:)
:)
Following on from @Ventings people that ignore you. People you know and you see in public: they've seen you, but either turn there head away or look down, or wait for you to approach them.
Noooo :).
I still have a big list. We’re at 0.98%.