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As caregivers/helpers, we’re already dealing with un-ending stress. Add to that people we bump into who get on our nerves:



What kind of people get on your nerves?



It can help to let it out. For me, it’s rude people. And people who do things behind your back.

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Overly polite people.
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anonymous1732518 Aug 2023
Interesting like who?
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Verbally aggressive people.
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Weak, whiney people.
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People who insist the Covid pandemic is over. LO, me and others are at high risk. With our comorbidities, Covid could devastate us. Yet so many are saying Covid isn’t real. It was certainly real to 12 of my family members and friends. They’re dead. In the US, more than 9000 people with Covid were hospitalized in the last week of July 2023. 500 - 600 dying each week. According to Associated Press.
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MJ1929 Aug 2023
Agreed.

My husband and I are on vacation visiting our two sons and daughter-in-law. DIL just started a new job last week doing in-home speech therapy for early childhood patients.

Someone in one of those homes just couldn't be bothered to cancel their appointment because someone was sick, and DIL was down with Covid within 36 hours.

I'm now the only one left standing. Four people in this house have it, and I'm cooking, cleaning, walking the dog, picking up prescriptions and groceries, and I don't want to catch it. I know I will, too.

Ironically, two weeks ago my DIL left a hospital job she had throughout Covid doing post-stroke speech therapy for patients with Covid. She never caught it there.
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People who always need to have the last word.
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Bullies, back stabbers, impatient people, hypocrites, complainers
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Bossy, aggressive people. The kind to try to get you to spend all of your time with the loved one, to make their lives easier, then complain how you're taken care of the loved one.
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oldageisnotfun Aug 2023
yeah them too.. I think we're going to get to me 98% of the people fairly soon..... :)
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People who have no manners. And people who ignore you when they know they should reply promptly to solve an issue, and not keep you waiting.
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oldageisnotfun Aug 2023
Yeah them too :)
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Argumentative "right-fighters" who cannot accept that we are all different, we all have different opinions and different ways of seeing the world, and we don't all have to agree on something in order to be decent and respectful of one another.
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oldageisnotfun Aug 2023
In this case I do agree with you AD :)

Well said. The ones we feel like saying, Give me a break.
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For me it's fake people. I'd rather be around a genuine a**hole than be around a fake saint.
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Isthisrealyreal Aug 2023
I agree 100%.

It's good to know where people stand.
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Venting great question.

Hmm.. let me think...probably about 98% I've met.. I agree with others too about genuine people and not pretentious people.

I think there's group of certain usernames that sound really genuine on this forum for instance.

It's hard to meet a true friend for example; someone that will not bail on you the moment things get tough, someone you can depend on and will not judge you. I knew someone like this once. No longer on this planet, but still missed.

I believe there are, friends, and there are, true friend in this world, by the time you're taking tally of remaining friend in your life, the true one's for a lot of people will be 10 fingers minus 9 fingers, and some never have a true friend.
 
I guess if people have partners, their other half is supposed to be their true friend.

In desperate situations—survival situations—you'll soon see who your true friends are. So it's people who pretend to be good friends but end up being superficial when you need them most.
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MargaretMcKen Aug 2023
One of mine is those who say "genuine people". Fakes are hard to find.
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People who whine and cry. Then you give them suggestions and there is always a reason why they can't do it. Its like they want u to do it for them when they are perfectly capable of doing it themselves.
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NeedHelpWithMom Aug 2023
I call them, the ‘Yes, but’ people. They are stuck…it happens. They are miserable and indeed they do make others uncomfortable.
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People who leave conversations on a bad note, instead of resolving things together so all people concerned can feel OK. By leaving (for example by not replying in writing), the other people are left with the unfinished conversation uncomfortably running around in their minds.
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Fawnby Aug 2023
I know a whole family that has conducted their family life like this. Basic tactic is to get mad at another family member first, then leave the premises if the family member tries to discuss or fix the problem. Nothing is ever resolved. They think this is normal.
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People who are ignorant about caregiving yet give you crap and don't believe that their LO actually, medically diagnosed, has dementia. Why is that soooo hard to accept? So, I have a few less relatives that I'm close to now because I'm not putting up with their condescending ignorant crappola. Done.
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Fawnby Aug 2023
Or they insist that it's mild dementia, beginning dementia, anything to minimize the dementia. Or they say it's some other malady, like PTSD when maybe that's there too but the person also clearly has dementia because of obvious signs that can't be missed by someone who has dealt with it repeatedly.
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People who waste my time or have no respect for it.
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ventingisback Aug 2023
Yes!
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People who give unsolicited advice on topics about which they know nothing but are sure they do.
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Lately, it's been the kind who are breathing in my general vicinity. ;) It's a joke, folks so no need to get upset.
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ventingisback Aug 2023
Holding my breath.
;)
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People like the ones overseeing this website and take it upon themselves to remove whole sentences from our responses and or change the wording of the question without our permission.
Like for me this morning when I responded to Ricardo who asked about who speaks for the demented, and in my response was the line something about letting me be the first to say SHAME ON YOU for implying that most caregivers on here only care about themselves. I'm paraphrasing as I've been gone since this morning and don't recall exactly my wording but it's close and since it's been deleted I can't go back and check it, plus apparently that question has now been closed for further comment.
And I know that some have had their responses deleted in the past as well. It would be nice if AC would let us know that they're deleting something we wrote and why wouldn't it?
So today(and other days as well)the folks overseeing this website get on my nerves.
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ventingisback Aug 2023
I hear you! And I agree!
(((Hug)))

You know, AC could add on a comment that they’ve changed:
(Edited by AC)
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Yes, rude and insincere people really annoy me. Since we've put cameras in our house, we sometimes hear the mean things and unfounded accusations my parents say (usually my father). It makes us even more discouraged and leaves us wondering why we are trying so hard to care for them.
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ventingisback Aug 2023
“Since we've put cameras in our house, we sometimes hear the mean things and unfounded accusations my parents say (usually my father).”

That must be very upsetting to overhear. :(
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People who interrupt and talk over you, while you’re talking. And people who pretend to be good people.
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oldageisnotfun Aug 2023
Question is, What's the secret to knowing if someone is good or not? I guess eventually people find out.

It's like living in the same house with a person and knowing what they're like, but to general people and people that only see the person for short periods and have never lived with them, they will think on the surface that the person is great; they're kind, generous, and so on, but only after living with someone do you know their true nature. Not sure if anyone else agrees?
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In my case... Siblings!
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Let’s face it, even in the best of circumstances people can get on each other’s nerves.

I love people but I also enjoy solitude. Too much togetherness isn’t good for anyone.

Take time for yourself, to be completely alone.

Read a book that you have been wanting to read. Go for a walk. Listen to your favorite music! Soak in the tub. In other words, do something just for you that you enjoy.
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Bossy people who think they know it all.

People who seem to want to argue and disagree…..as if it’s a sport.

People who suffer with physical and/or mental illness, but refuse to accept treatment. They have no qualms with making those around them as miserable as they are.
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;)

What is your favorite way of shutting up a rude person?

Thinking up a super cool and clever insult 6 years later in the shower.
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Arm chair experts; they know everything on every topic/subject in the entire universe and have an opinion on everything cuz they know everything!

People who talk down to you or at you. Or talk over you by raising their voice to silence you.

People who lack any self-awareness, basic moral compass, smidgen of compassion/empathy.

Too many to list!
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All people get on my nerves.

The question reminded me of this Seinfeld bit

(437) Seinfeld - People are the Worst.avi - YouTube
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NeedHelpWithMom Aug 2023
I love Seinfeld! I saw his standup comedy act many years ago at the Sanger Theatre here in New Orleans. Very funny!
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Jean-Paul Sartre said it best: *L’enfer, c’est les autres.* (“Hell is other people”)…well, there are certainly nice exceptions to that, but for *moi,* the sort of people whom I avoid are whiners, hand-wringers, weak-willed wafflers who complain but don’t DO anything to change their situations. I also hate bossy, sanctimonious types. Who doesn’t?

But these people don’t really “get on my nerves”, as I just won’t fool with ‘em.
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Certain people who interrupt me with great confidence and force. Also, those people that finish, (think they're finishing correctly), my sentence get on my nerves. They oh so loose a lot when I experience that with someone.

I use to stop talking when interrupted, but recently I've started to practice, with great calm, and masterly steadfast strength, to finish my sentence and even add things either pertinent to the subject, or I'd even take a hard left turn, in the same unmodulating tone, add something like - "I don't care if you're being rude I will still continue to talk because interrupting is not right…" going on and on until they shut the heck up.

The best thing is to see their reaction. They're completely stunned, and I'm still calm, and dang well smiling like a blinking Mona Lisa. It's an amazing thing to do.

I have to be very tired, on my last nerve, or fed-up to bother to behave like this. But when I do I know it sounds crazy, and tough.

I don't care what they think. That type of person may never again have the pleasure of conversing with me. Raspberries.
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NeedHelpWithMom Aug 2023
Interesting…

Does this work for you? Or do they keep talking too and both of you are speaking at the same time?
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People who ignore you. The silent treatment is a very cruel form of abuse. Then sometimes you see those ignorers talking to others, making it even more clear they want to ignore you.
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Have we reached 98% (probably higher) of the people yet? :) btw, I start off on the basis of treating every person with equal kindness & compassion, until they steer away from these values.

Following on from @Ventings people that ignore you. People you know and you see in public: they've seen you, but either turn there head away or look down, or wait for you to approach them.
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ventingisback Aug 2023
“Have we reached 98% (probably higher) of the people yet? :)”

Noooo :).
I still have a big list. We’re at 0.98%.
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