Mom is 80, in memory care facility. She has unspecified dementia, more akin to vascular or lewy bodies than Alzheimer’s. She has okay days and bad days. On okay days, she complains that she can't see well with her 4-year-old prescription eyeglasses. She also seems to have the condition where she misidentifies objects. She says "Please take me to get new glasses and I want sunglasses too."
Today I showed up and said "let's go get those new glasses." (I had made the appointment 2 months ago, the soonest available in this area.) Well, today happened to be a very bad day for mom. She was yelling and ultra delusional, talking to people in her head and insisting I talk to them also. She ranted that she was supposed to go move into her aunt's house on the water (she had packed clothes and notebooks into a bag) and she was NOT going to the doctor, it was all a trick and I needed to shut up and quit doing drugs.Then she went out in the hall and started fussing at other memory care visitors for walking past her room.
Two days ago we had a fairly lovely visit and she was somewhat normal-ish. She walked around a department store smiling and enjoyed some ice cream.
I can't take a yelling cursing woman into a family eye clinic, even if I could lift her.It's too bad they can't bring all that heavy eye exam equipment into senior care homes. She really does need better lenses.
Your mom would not do well trying to read the signs at the optometrists office anyway, so quit stressing over this issue and go buy her some reading glasses.
Imo, it's not possible to give a real prescription eye exam to an elder with this level of dementia. She'll wind up cross eyed with the totally wrong prescription for $500 at the end of the day.
She might be doing this to get you to "visit" her instead of a legit need for glasses.
Next time make the appointment and regardless of mood take her. Odds are she will be "better" once she's at the appointment. But when it comes time to pay for new glasses she will start "the Show" again. I've worn glasses since I was 7 and I've seen plenty of senior citizens throw fits in eye clinics. Your mom won't be the last or first to do it.
Get her some cheater readers at the Dollar store, and be done with it. Don't waste your time and energy making optometry appts. considering Mom's combative mental state. Does she also loose her glasses often? Wear them daily?
You can call her doctor who RXd the last pair, and tell him to increase the power.
Or tell Mom she may have cataracts and need surgery. That will stop her complaining. She may actually have them! I'd have a hard time helping anyone who tells me to shutup and stop doing drugs....Mother or not.
I flunked the DMV eye test 5 years ago, and found out I had them! I had 2 surgeries to remove them during 2020. Good luck!
Which type of doctor would your Mom be going to to see: ophthalmologist, optometrist, or optician? Today's ophtalmologist have state of the art equipment that makes it easier. Example, there is a computer (autorefractor) that can actually diagnosis an eye prescription. Mom would sit looking into a screen at a small picture and has to keep her eyes still, it only takes a couple of minutes.....
Then the doctor can put that prescription into the refractor machine to double check (that's the machine where one answers if A or B is better). The doctor can even check eye pressure without the need of eye drops.
My nephew has had glasses since 8 months old. When I asked the doctor how did they know the right perscription, they said by the refraction of light on the eye. So Mom will not have to go thru the lens thing. But, it may not be her eyes it may be her brain.