He has dementia. They plan to take a third of his money in order to "preserve his estate" but my Dad is incapable of making or agreeing with this decision. If he did not have dementia, I know he would not agree with this. Can taking his money and setting it aside in each sibling's name be seen as elder abuse? I do not agree with what they are planning to do, but they tell me it is "perfectly legal." Very upset about this.
What do they mean by "preserve his estate?" Preserve it for themselves? Have they stated an intention to share with you or other relatives? Are they saving that money to use for his care? If so, why not leave it in his name?
I think you and your sisters need to consult an attorney who specializes in Elder Law, and can advise them how best to legally manage his estate at this point. If they won't agree to this, go on your own, explain the situation, and ask for advice about preventing problems for your father.
The second problem is that large gifts can make you ineligible for Medicaid if you need it within five years.
It would be better for them to talk to a tax man first.
I see no purpose in taking a third of the money and setting it aside in children's accounts. It can set in your father's account just as comfortably. Did they mention why they wanted to do this?
But, they could get away with this if no one ever checks up on them properly. If you are willing to act for your father, tell them upfront that what they are planning is illegal and wrong and you WILL pursue the matter if they attempt it. Refer them to the relevant laws. Get your hands on all documentation possible. Then keep an eye on them.
Plus there are the Medicaid issues, taxes, etc, which could put your father in a vulnerable position.
They are counting on the fact that the look back period is five years. I feel that this is cheating the system and risky because the laws may change and my Dad my need more money before the five years is up. There is no way to predict the future. I also do not want my Dad to go on Medicaid (which is welfare) unless he was absolutely out of money. A Tax Attormey has advised them and they all think this is a slick plan. I think it stinks.