My mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia a few months ago (hindsight...a few years of mild symptoms). Her anxiety, paranoid behaviors and insomnia seem to be increasing lately. Actually, she may have a few good days then a week of bad days-is this normal? She had a full work up in the ER today due to dizziness and generalized weakness but everything was normal. This illness has me baffled.
She is at the point where she knows she is losing function, and that causes the upsets. If you can keep her calm, she will do better longer.
I wouldn't try to explain to her that she has dementia. With my father the most I'll say to him after a big boo boo he's made is"well maybe you're starting to forget a little bit" he's ok with that but he freaks if I suggest he get tested for dementia.
Don't argue with Mom or constantly correct her. This will only upset her. Distract her, change the subject, tell her what she needs to hear to feel safe and calm, and fib when you have to.
It is the new normal and it's downhill from here. I don't mean to be abrupt or scare you but learn all you can about dementia. This site has been a great resourse for me as Dad and I began this journey.
She went from running her own household to being incontinent and wheelchair bound in a Secure Memory Care unit in less than a few months. Suffers severe memory loss.
Initially, the doctor told my cousin that she had memory issues in her office, but my cousin didn't relate that to AD or dementia. She also told her she had balance issues, blood pressure, etc. And that she needed help and therapy. It wasn't until later, when we saw the neurologist that things got more detailed. The neurologist told her she had memory loss and that it could be from a number of reasons and he listed the reasons. From that day forward, we just called it memory loss and that we would treat it.
The only thing she ever said about it, was that she hated to lose memories of her wonderful parents. There was never a reason to frighten her by giving her details about Vascular dementia or AD. Besides, she would have forgotten it anyway. Now, she doesn't know she's sick. She thinks she works and lives in the memory care unit.
I would watch her anxiety, paranoia, agitation, and depression. Sometimes they get very anxious and worry a lot. Crying is quite common. Cymbalta really helped my cousin. I would keep that in mind and have your mom evaluated by her doctor if you see she is suffering mentally. There are many options. Keeping them as content as possible is my motto. Be careful if they prescribe Xanax. It's not that good for people with dementia, from my experience AND it may increase their dizziness. My cousin fell TWICE while taking it.
I would read a lot about the condition so you know what to expect. There are things you can do that will make life more manageable for you and your mom. It's never easy though. I would start now thinking about her future care. Eventually, the normal days don't exist and her care is a 24/7 responsibility. I wish you both the best.