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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
You could contact your local Alzheimer's Association and see if someone can come out and evaluate her. Often, people will listen to a third party, so if this social worker comes out and sees your mother needs help, she may be able to get her to a doctor.
Hi Traci~I think that the refusal of your MIL to go to a doctor or to have a needed evaluation is quite normal for the most part. I think that either she does not want to hear the truth about a possible condition (denial)..or she wants to sheild you from the truth.
If your MIL is lucid--can you explain to her that making such an appointment is not for her benefit only, but for your peace of mind as well?
Not fully aware of the situation---it may be possible, if it is treatable, and to do this at an early stage--rather than later.
As carol has suggested--bringing someone to your MIL-and possibly evaluate her situation sounds like a very good alternative. If you think your MIL will be resistant to this--you may even have to trick her-and say that the person is just an old friend. In my case-having my mom finally accepting a doctor's visit---worked-as he was a professional person of authority.
Traci---I have been there as well-and between my own experiences, and from what I have read and learned-you need to do this sooner rather than later. Once some type of evaluation is made--you then will know what direction to turn.
If possible-Please let me as well as the others in the thread know how you are progressing. I am a big believer in support--so take as much support as you find.
We had a similar issue with my FIL. While he did frequently visit his doctors - to get refills or to complain of a certain problem like itchy skin or edema.... he was not fully truthful about his decline. (The fact that none of his local kids went with him didn't help!) We arranged a home visit by a social worker and then a geriatrician. Once they evaluated him, we were able to set up several services and got the rest of the family more involved. Now, my FIL allows someone to accompany him to doctors visits.
she's 88 and refuse to go in the hospital when a emergency dr. told her that they see 2 large black mass in her colon how can her kids over ride her to get her the medical she needs
A relative of mine refused to see any doctors or follow any instructions (like no more driving) and the one doctor who knew about her condition called in Adult Protective Services (the government) who sent an evaluator out. After the evaluation, the government told the Durable Power of Attorney (DPOA) to get her into a facility or they were going to take her and her resources and do it. At that point, the DPOA took over, applied for and was granted guardianship and took care of business. All with the elder fighting every step. So Adult Protective Services will eventually take steps if no one else will. The DPOA took the relative to a facility just to 'look around' and pre-arranged to leave her there. It worked. Rough, but it was the best way given the circumstances facing them.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Good luck,
Carol
If your MIL is lucid--can you explain to her that making such an appointment is not for her benefit only, but for your peace of mind as well?
Not fully aware of the situation---it may be possible, if it is treatable, and to do this at an early stage--rather than later.
As carol has suggested--bringing someone to your MIL-and possibly evaluate her situation sounds like a very good alternative. If you think your MIL will be resistant to this--you may even have to trick her-and say that the person is just an old friend. In my case-having my mom finally accepting a doctor's visit---worked-as he was a professional person of authority.
Traci---I have been there as well-and between my own experiences, and from what I have read and learned-you need to do this sooner rather than later. Once some type of evaluation is made--you then will know what direction to turn.
If possible-Please let me as well as the others in the thread know how you are progressing. I am a big believer in support--so take as much support as you find.
Good luck to you.
Hap
If she is competent and wants no treatment , that's really the most compassionate thing to do.