I tried asking her... why did she hear me in the kitchen cooking, preparing her a meal but didn't say anything beforehand. No answer to that. She just keeps saying she doesn't want it.
I then asked her, if she thinks it's rotten, why did she allow me to eat it without saying anything.
She had diarrhea this morning and she thinks it's because of the food. She says she doesn't want the food because it came from the store. I asked her how else am I supposed to get food.
She doesn't have dementia. Or at least I don't think she does. She's 74 years old and bedridden. Sometimes I think she has cognitive decline because of being bedridden. I don't know.
What should I do? She normally eats every day.
I also told her that I don't mind cleaning up her bowel movement, so there shouldn't be an issue.
If she doesn't eat one time, it shouldn't hurt her, but I wish I just had an answer on what to say to her to get her to eat. And also, what should I do for myself because she's basically in bed "humming" as she calls it.. and her humming drives me insane. I also do not like chaos in the house because it gives me anxiety. I'm always in fix it mode.
What should I do?
I'd call her Dr. re: her appetite, diarrhea, humming. Good to check if these are side effects of any medications, supplements. Stress may be a factor for both of you; can cause diarrhea, too.
Maybe she's bored lying in bed and doesn't realize she's humming loudly (hearing may be bad?).
You have to make time for you to break before you do. Can you get any help? even if only part time? anything?
And as for boredom, try music. Create playlists of her favorite music and keep a CD player in her room that gives her music for thirty minutes or so; you'll need to experiment with how long she wants to listen. And find something to occupy her hands: beats (is she used to praying with beads?), other colored pieces, little pieces of fabric that she might make something from? It's trial and error.
If it goes on too long, maybe ask her doctor for advice. When I had small children who turned their noses up at food, my pediatrician said to me "They won't starve." Just keep offering food. Vary the textures and temperatures. Don't make it a power struggle because you'll lose. You can't make anyone eat.
Is she eligible for Meals on Wheels? You would probably feel less insulted if she were turning down food that you hadn't prepared. Best of luck!
As far as the humming goes, do you think you could get a white noise machine or play soft music in the house? That might take the edge off.
If she is bedridden, she may be bored. TV is not the best entertainment. Look into crafts, books, and other activities she can do from her bed.
As far as humming, play a soft music for her. Too quiet of the environment cause them to entertain themselves like that. Distract her with music, movies etc. Reading, writing and doing coloring are great ways of helping her to slow the process of cognitive decline.
I hope I could help....
Wish you luck my dear...Enjoy her while she's here.
Best wishes🙏🙏🙏
You should introduce her to a drink called Ensure. Comes in a variety of flavors and has good protein in it.
She can try it to substitute 1 meal a day.
Get her involved with her meals, ask her what she would like to eat, make a list of the things she would like and prepare them for her.
As you get older, it's not unusual for your eating habits to change as food can start not tasting the same.
My father started becoming a very picky eater and I just made a list of things he liked to eat and that's what he eats. It doesn't matter if it's the same things, as long as they're getting their food groups like Protein, Veggies, Fruit, Bread She may just want simpler things like my Dad, he loves his applesause, yougurt, oatmeal, waffles, beans, potato salad, eggs, Milk, Ensyre, breakfast bars and maybe a couple other items.
He even stopped eating meat because he said it was hard to chew.
As far as the humming goes, being bed ridden, it's not like she has an awful lot of things to do and humming may be like singing and good for the soul.
You could see if you could get her to watch TV or Listen to Music. That way she can wear earphones you you wouldn't have to hear.
Juse remember, one of these days when she's gone, you'll miss her humming.
See All Answers