My parents 89 and 90 recently moved in with me. My mother does not want to cook or clean or do much of anything. She doesn't feel like it is her house, etc. I think she resents that I am doing all the things for my father that she used to do but no longer wants to do (she is still able to cook, clean, etc with some effort, but continually says over and over she doesn't WANT to cook.). So, I cook and clean and she sits and pouts?? How do I handle this? Dad seems perfectly content except for that Mom is not happy although she has a lovely house with a swimming pool that she wanted.
I think the best thing to do is ignore the behavior. Remain upbeat and positive as you prepare the meals, etc. Ask your mom to do little things like chop veggies, etc. If she refuses, just go on about your business.
There may be some unresolved issue between your parents that you do not even know about and doing nothing is her way of "punishing" him....who knows??
Stay out of the fray. Please do not try and make your mom happy. No one can do that for her and you will be walking on eggs for the whole time they are there. Remember they are guests in YOUR home and it sounds like a lovely home....Lilli