My mom has been my dad's POA. I had to move my Dad close to me to Care for him. I had nothing on him, didn’t even have copies of his insurance stuff. The NH had him sign a POA putting me in charge of his health because my Mom is 4.5 hours away. The NH also said the only POA they had on file from the other place had him as his own POA which is not what my parents said they had done.
Anyways, we are moving my mom here in December. Do I give her back the POA or leave it like it is? I wonder if she will be upset about this? I had to do it and my Dad agreed.
A POA is a lot of responsibility. It's a blessing to your parents that you have the POA for your dad. It's good for a younger person to have it as your mom may or may not be able to make decisions for your dad when the time comes, Just like now. She's not there and you are. But all that has to happen is that your dad can sign a new POA giving your mom back the responsibility if that is what he decides he wants to do. The POA needs to be someone your dad trusts to carry out his wishes. Someone that is willing to accept the responsibility. Is your mom competent? Did your dad give you financial and medical POA? And please realize, the only person you can give a POA for is yourself. Should something happen to your dad to where he lost the ability to make decisions for himself, he would not be able to sign another one.
So you do not give your dads POA to your mother, only your dad can assign his own POA.
By the way, who has your mothers POA? If it is your dad, that should probably be changed. With him being in the NH he is most likely not able to act in her stead should something happen to her.
Is it easy to do another POA when my Mom arrives or to put my daughter on his as secondary? She is a nurse.
It's not uncommon for spouses to assign one another BUT the problem is if they have a health issue and then are unable to act they are left with no one to act for them.
A younger person is better for that reason.
Do you have siblings? I assume not.
The best thing to do is have an elder attorney counsel your family. Someone who can look at all their finances. Your dad is in the NH. Is he on private pay? Will he someday need Medicaid?
These are all things you need to discuss with the attorney.
You can learn a lot by reading this website but when it comes right down to it everyone's lives are unique and each state has different laws. Find an attorney to advise you and your parents.
I had to do something so I could even ask questions about him and access his records to make sure he is receiving the best care possible. The NH told me they don’t normally do that, but in this case they would.
My Mom has all of their papers and they have good lawyers where they lived. My Mom moves here mid December.