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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s still very new and I’m sure the wound is raw. Be kind and gentle with yourself. I highly recommend attending GriefShare meetings, they are a wonderful network for help and healing. It’s okay to be tired and want to check out a bit. If it lingers be sure to get an updated medical evaluation and possibly medicinal help for the sadness and tiredness
Any time I'm forced to deal with a traumatic event, all I want to do is sleep and do nothing when I'm awake. It's a sign of depression and trying to get over the traumatic event. Sleeping shuts out conscious thought entirely and allows you time to unconsciously process your huge loss. Healing takes a long time and it's a very hard thing to go through.
My condolences on the loss of your husband. Please do see your doctor if your desire to sleep lasts too long and you need some help with your grief. We all need help with life's troubles from time to time. Hugs.
Bereavement is normal after the death of a close person. It will pass eventually. You should maintain close contact with friends and relatives during this difficult time.
You are not only grieving the loss of your husband, but you are also exhausted from your years of caring for him. So please be kind to yourself. You are very early in your grieving process, and just starting to process that your life now will never be the same. If need be, talk to your doctor about going on an antidepressant, even if it's only temporary. Also like it's been suggested, look into attending some Grief Share meetings when you're ready, as it can be very helpful to be able to share with others who have lost a loved one as well. I personally recommend the book Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief by Martha W. Hickman. It has a short devotion for each day and allows you to process your grief in little snippets. My husband has been dead for a year and 4 months now and I still read it every day. I cared for my husband for many, many years, and I can tell you for the first 4 months or so, I felt like I was just wandering around my house not knowing what I should be doing with myself, as I had kind of lost myself over the years. But I am here to tell you that things do get better and life does go on. It doesn't happen overnight, but it will happen. So for now just take good care of yourself, and do what you want, if you want and when you want. God bless you my sister in grief.
Having lost my wife 4 years ago, I can tell you, trying to understand your loss is tough. Trying to cope with the reality of your husband's death is tough. Grief can cause listlessness, insomnia, and fatigue. These conditions are not unusual after the loss of a loved one, especially a spouse. Your grief is a testimony of your love for him. The loss of your husband means the loss of intimacy, the interdependence you shared, and the future you were planning for. The life you shared contributed to who you are. Maybe it seems like there's nothing important to get up for now. But even with that, and that's a lot, your life still has meaning and purpose. Like myself, you may be asking “Who am I without my husband?", "What defines my life?", "What will be my new normal?”. It may take a while to answer these questions, but you will answer them. As trite as it sounds, life goes on.
Susan J. Zonnebelt-Smeenge's book “Getting to the Other Side of Grief, Overcoming the Loss of a Spouse”, is an excellent book that may help you understand your loss, and how to recover from it. It'll take time. Many of us have experienced the loss of our spouse, but in time, have come to live a satisfying life. You will, too.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My condolences on the loss of your husband. Please do see your doctor if your desire to sleep lasts too long and you need some help with your grief. We all need help with life's troubles from time to time. Hugs.
If need be, talk to your doctor about going on an antidepressant, even if it's only temporary.
Also like it's been suggested, look into attending some Grief Share meetings when you're ready, as it can be very helpful to be able to share with others who have lost a loved one as well.
I personally recommend the book Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief by Martha W. Hickman. It has a short devotion for each day and allows you to process your grief in little snippets. My husband has been dead for a year and 4 months now and I still read it every day.
I cared for my husband for many, many years, and I can tell you for the first 4 months or so, I felt like I was just wandering around my house not knowing what I should be doing with myself, as I had kind of lost myself over the years.
But I am here to tell you that things do get better and life does go on. It doesn't happen overnight, but it will happen. So for now just take good care of yourself, and do what you want, if you want and when you want.
God bless you my sister in grief.
May The Lord give you grieving mercies, comfort and strength during this difficult time.
Please be gentle with yourself, it is still early days and it's been a long journey.
Great big warm hug!
Susan J. Zonnebelt-Smeenge's book “Getting to the Other Side of Grief, Overcoming the Loss of a Spouse”, is an excellent book that may help you understand your loss, and how to recover from it. It'll take time. Many of us have experienced the loss of our spouse, but in time, have come to live a satisfying life. You will, too.