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My beautiful grandma is almost 98, she has advanced heart failure and recently fluid built up on one lung. She is stable at home and on oxygen which keeps her sats above 90.


Generally she likes to sleep now, lost all mobility. When she was in hospital she just slept and refused food, we were told 1 to 2 weeks would be it. Brought her home yesterday and she has started to eat 3 meals and talk. However how long can she or have others lasted on oxygen?


She is also slightly disorientated and although in general better spirits gets confused where she is. I know she is end of life but I can't accept we may just have 1 week with her. Guess I'm looking for hope :(

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At the age of 98---you know your grandma does not have 10-20 years, right? Advanced heart failure is a slow death. You can keep ramping up the oxygen, so her osats are 'fine' but there does come a point when their bodies just cannot accept the oxygen supplement.

At this point, each person is different than the next. Daddy lived for 2 weeks on 'full oxygen' but grandma lived only a couple of days.

I'd just offer her the foods she likes, give her plenty of love and time together if that is what she wants. She's lost all mobility---do you really want her to live like this much more than a week, if even that?

We have to accept that a person's timeline is theirs, and therefore different than another person's.

I wish you peace and calm and a gentle end for grandma. She is lucky to be so loved.
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At some point try to understand that "hope" can also include the hope for peace. When Congestive heart failure comes to the extent that it is both left and right heart (the left failure being the more impactful failure due to fluid accumulation in the lungs) it means that the heart is failing. At 98, a failing heart has no cure. There are only diuretics to ease the inevitable. The pump is failing. Short of a heart transplant there is no cure now. And of course that is impossible. I hope Hospice is there now. I hope they will help guide you through your grandmother's passage. A passage we all make. I am so sorry for your grief. The disorientation will get worse as there is less and less O2 to the brain. O2 can help, but ultimately nothing can stop the fact that the "pump" is now failing. I am sorry also that no one can truly give you a timeline; even doctors directly involved in her care will be unable to help with that. It is important now that she is comfortable, without pain, and not feeling desperate from air hunger. I hope Hospice is with you. While their medications may mean death comes sooner by some few hours or a day, death is now inevitable and the important thing is prevention of panic and anxiety with air hunger. My best to you. I am so sorry for your loss.
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Transient Jan 2021
Thank you for your reply. I accept it is the end even though it is painful. She is still experiencing disorientation isn't this meant to ease with being on oxygen 24/7?
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It is impossible to ever know how long someone can live under such seemingly dire conditions.

The best you can hope for is for the rest of her life to be painfree and pleasant.

That's nice that she has rallied and is eating and talking. Enjoy it. At her advanced age, it could change at any time. She's had a very long life so hope for an easy ending and remember that she has been loved and lived much longer than the average person. Find some way to peace with thoughts like those.
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