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Which best describes their mobility?
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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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You don't. If your loved one is at the point of needing a memory care facility, they are well beyond comprehension of any discussion regarding that. Instead pick out the one the family thinks is best, get their room their set up with some of their favorite things and family photos and move them in.
Many times it is not discussed , as it is not always comprehended by someone with dementia . They often think they are fine .
Often the person needing MC is told a fib that they need to stay while some work is done on their house , if they are likely to forget . Others just “ take LO to lunch “ and are then brought to their new apartment .
I just finished moving my mom from Assisted Living to Memory Care. I did not discuss it with her at all. There was no point, and I knew that any discussion would just upset her.
I went to her AL room while she was at meals and at activities and prepared everything--measured her furniture to figure out what would fit in her new MC room and where to place everything, went through her belongings to determine what to keep and what to donate/discard, and made a list of things to purchase for her new room. Then I started removing the donate/discard items and dealing with them. My mother never noticed that anything was going missing.
My out of state sister came to town, and we started moving Mom's belongings to her new room. (We opted to pay a little extra to have a few days of overlap between the lease dates, and that facilitated the preparation of the new room.) Over the course of about three days, we pretty much stripped Mom's AL room bare of everything except furniture and personal hygiene items. Again, Mom never noticed.
On the day the movers came to move the furniture, my sister took Mom out to Walmart and then to lunch. The movers moved the furniture, and I set everything up/put everything away.
My sister brought Mom back to the building, and brought her to the MC unit, and we welcomed her to her new room. It went surprisingly well, and she is settling in and adapting.
As said, just research MCs in your area and find the one that seems the best for LO and place them. I said nothing to my Mom until the day of the move. My daughter stayed with her while we got the room ready. Arranging things as much like home as possible. Then we picked her up and told her she was going to a new apt where she would meet other people. Mom acclimated pretty well but she was probably in her 6th stage.
There is no "discussion" If you are POA then moving the person with dementia to Memory Care is in their best interest, for their safety and possibly as well as the safety of other family members. Moving a person to Memory Care, or to any facility that will care for the person is not a easy, quick decision. It is one fraught with "guilt", grief, and at last excepting that the care of this person is more than you can manage at home.
Now if you are talking about discussing with one parent the need to move a spouse that is a different matter and it is one that you need to get them to acknowledge that they can not care for their spouse alone, you can no longer help to the degree that needs to be met. That can be a tough talk. If this is the case try to come up with options that can be tried. Caregivers, Adult Day Care, Respite Stays any of these might help....for a little while.
I have a similar issue in that I am looking into a caregiver for 6 hours a week. She in no uncertain terms told me “over her dead body”! My answer is that when the time comes i will let someone she trusts work the issue, like her doctor or her children.
After our family meeting with our mom's physician it was abreed that me and my sisters would have a family meeti to discuss to discuss which Nursing facility would be a fit for our mom before any mention nursing home to her. However as soon as our mother spent a week with sisyer with POA she goes and make remarks to her about being put into a nursing facility. Now every day mother is saying she doesnt want to to nursing home. And now saying it's because of me. Any comments welcomed.
As my mother's memory is going, we have introduced the concept of "playing cards" with other people, meeting new people, doing things she would like to do. She chose her nursing facility two months ago. She knows what will happen if my dad dies first - go to nursing facility. She knows that if she dies first, Dad gets to stay in his home with four caregivers on 24/7 care as they have today. What she doesn't know is that if she gets too unruly for the caregivers to handle both at once, we may choose to move her to the facility to keep her mind busy. We are in contact with the facility and take her to visit each month to "remind" her of the wonderful place it is...and give the director an opportunity to keep track of my mother's progress toward being there. To me the conversation takes place as we age and just start memory loss so there are no surprises. BUT, my grandfather simply needed his "special things" in his room and all was well for the most part. For everyone I have seen / heard with dementia, there are moments of lucidity and conversations can be had during those times. REALLY LISTENING for the nuances that tell you "this" is a special item, not asking, but observing. My mother will need her paintings, her bed, her dresser and the clothes she wears regularly. She will also need her jewelry (nothing expensive) that hangs on the wall as decoration. Each person is a little different, but acknowledging the good of a facility - company of people that could be "friends", not having LO at home to disrupt everything - and valuing LO's "special things" are important. None of it is easy. Acknowledging that we are not "sending them away", will visit (if you really will). Listening, not talking has gotten me farther that anything...with LO, with sisters, with caregivers.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Instead pick out the one the family thinks is best, get their room their set up with some of their favorite things and family photos and move them in.
Often the person needing MC is told a fib that they need to stay while some work is done on their house , if they are likely to forget . Others just “ take LO to lunch “ and are then brought to their new apartment .
I went to her AL room while she was at meals and at activities and prepared everything--measured her furniture to figure out what would fit in her new MC room and where to place everything, went through her belongings to determine what to keep and what to donate/discard, and made a list of things to purchase for her new room. Then I started removing the donate/discard items and dealing with them. My mother never noticed that anything was going missing.
My out of state sister came to town, and we started moving Mom's belongings to her new room. (We opted to pay a little extra to have a few days of overlap between the lease dates, and that facilitated the preparation of the new room.) Over the course of about three days, we pretty much stripped Mom's AL room bare of everything except furniture and personal hygiene items. Again, Mom never noticed.
On the day the movers came to move the furniture, my sister took Mom out to Walmart and then to lunch. The movers moved the furniture, and I set everything up/put everything away.
My sister brought Mom back to the building, and brought her to the MC unit, and we welcomed her to her new room. It went surprisingly well, and she is settling in and adapting.
If you are POA then moving the person with dementia to Memory Care is in their best interest, for their safety and possibly as well as the safety of other family members.
Moving a person to Memory Care, or to any facility that will care for the person is not a easy, quick decision. It is one fraught with "guilt", grief, and at last excepting that the care of this person is more than you can manage at home.
Now if you are talking about discussing with one parent the need to move a spouse that is a different matter and it is one that you need to get them to acknowledge that they can not care for their spouse alone, you can no longer help to the degree that needs to be met. That can be a tough talk. If this is the case try to come up with options that can be tried. Caregivers, Adult Day Care, Respite Stays any of these might help....for a little while.
that I am looking into a caregiver for 6 hours a week. She in no uncertain terms told me “over her dead body”! My answer is that when the time comes i will let someone she trusts work the issue, like her doctor or her children.
To me the conversation takes place as we age and just start memory loss so there are no surprises. BUT, my grandfather simply needed his "special things" in his room and all was well for the most part.
For everyone I have seen / heard with dementia, there are moments of lucidity and conversations can be had during those times. REALLY LISTENING for the nuances that tell you "this" is a special item, not asking, but observing. My mother will need her paintings, her bed, her dresser and the clothes she wears regularly. She will also need her jewelry (nothing expensive) that hangs on the wall as decoration.
Each person is a little different, but acknowledging the good of a facility - company of people that could be "friends", not having LO at home to disrupt everything - and valuing LO's "special things" are important.
None of it is easy. Acknowledging that we are not "sending them away", will visit (if you really will). Listening, not talking has gotten me farther that anything...with LO, with sisters, with caregivers.
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