Ever since my dad died my mom hasn’t kept up with her bills. She eventually got a letter in the mail that her home was heading into foreclosure. I wasn’t willing to pay the lump sum she owed as my sister (let’s call her M) and nephew who lived with my mom were the irresponsible/non working type plus the home was in tear down condition and I felt that getting involved was too risky for me financially. They somehow got my other nephew (we will call him B) to pay off the debts and save the home. In exchange, B would own a small portion of ownership. They told B they’d pay him rent since he had his own home and family he was paying for. Well they ended up not paying their rent sometimes and the home‘s condition continued to worsen. B kept expressing his frustrations about the house being trashed and how he was now stuck with all their expenses like missed rent payments, major home repairs and thousands in past due utilities that he’s had to pay. M and my nephew also destroyed the house with graffiti, hoarding and pest infestations. B ended up paying my nephew to move out and told my mom he was going to build a rental house on the property to generate money for everything but wouldn’t take out the loans to build unless he took over ownership completely. I know attorneys were involved and the home was put in his name 100%. I always knew my mom intended for her home to go to me and M (my sis) so this was upsetting but since B was being generous with handling the expenses, we all trusted that he would continue to always provide the home no matter what. M (B’s mom) who lives there has a drug problem and probably wouldn’t be able to live on her own. I felt comforted that B would always take care of M no matter what. Well I guess there’ve been several incidents over the years that have been costly for B, and M has also caused him loss of tenants/income and B said he’s had enough. A while ago, B tried to move M out and was going to provide my mom with a live-in caregiver. This really upset me bc I couldn’t understand how he can even think about making his own mother move out. Then most recently, he asked my mom and M to move out and even secured them a rental bc he claims that M is making him lose tenants and without tenants he can’t afford to keep up with their expenses. The rental was beautiful but it was a rental.... not the home my mom has owned our whole lives. B said he would still pay for their shelter but I felt that wasn’t enough. Why can’t he just sell the house and buy her a new/less expensive house if expenses are too much? I didn’t like this decision and felt he was basically trying to steal my mom’s house. I got in a heated argument with him. He stopped responding to me and I got an attorney in an attempt to get the house returned to my mom. Since they did the original transfer with attorneys, my case isn’t looking strong but I know for certain that my mom doesn’t want to leave the home she has always known and I know she intended for this home to be passed down to me and M. My mom would never have let B take over completely if she thought he would ever try to move them out. B has blocked all contact with me and I’m afraid he will still try to move the family off the property. I’m sure he feels like he deserves it since he built the new home on the property and paid all those expenses but this was always a family home and the only home I’ve ever known. I’ve asked to buy it from him at the cost he paid before he built and renovated since that’s what I can afford but he wouldn’t even talk with me regarding this. What are my options here and how do I put an end to this or get the property back from him?
If you can save the house, you are going to incur the same problems ur cousin has. People who won't pay their share. You will then be putting good money after bad. Looks like to me Mom cannot keep the house. She just can't afford it without help. My suggestion is to find her a Senior apt where they charge on scale. The ones in my area are nice.
Your cousin stepped up when no one else would. He offered to care for his grandmother in a nice apt with an aide. He really deserves the house for all he has done. Life changes, we all need to change with it. You can't always have what you want, its not always possible. Mom needs better than what she has now and cousin has offered it. His mother has her own problems to deal with that he can't help her with. He can find resources but he can't make her do except them.
IMO, ur also throwing good money after bad. Things don't always work out the way we want. Have to grab onto what we can.
But to backtrack on all this, If your mom was abt to be foreclosed upon, she had delinquent outstanding mortgage. You give no info on your mom, but if she’s in her 80’s, that’s kinda unusual for still having a first mortgage, so was it a second mortgage or HELOC? If it’s this, where did the $ go? It will be very important if you mom should ever need to apply for LTC Medicaid. But that’s another issue. Whatever the case, there was mortgage/ secured lending $ owed.
To get foreclosure stopped, she would have need to become current in her payments. B loaned her $ under terms that were specific as to rent & maintenance. Your mom didn’t uphold the terms.
If your nephew B actually has the property 100% in his name.... like it’s recorded in his name in tax assessor/ state database.... it’s all his. That mortgage of your moms was paid off so the mortgage co did a Release of Deed of Trust. She owned it and then sold it to B. B need a Release to get it transferred & recorded.
Your mom signed off on documents selling the property. If “attorneys were involved”, the legal is going to be solid. Whatever desire she has to stay there, or intentions she told you, or put in her will to have it pass to you and Your sister does not matter. Its not hers. She sold it years ago. She’s a tenant, he can evict her if it comes down to it. By what you wrote - if this is all real - B imo has been super accommodating..... and for years.... he’s now found and rented his mom & gran a place to live, he paid for his drug addled brother to move out, yada yada. He didn’t “take over” anything, he owns it.
if you & mom want it, you buy it from him at his price.
Basically this isn't just too much "water under the bridge", this is a flood, and the resulting catastrophic mess left over.
I will be surprised if anyone can do anything about it at all. But you are currently seeing an attorney, so time will tell.
Remembering that you cannot control the actions of others will help save your energy.
Do consider filling in your profile, Elandel. Sometimes when new folks show up with exceptionally complex dilemmas there is a tendency for non-believers to think they are perhaps not quite genuine. Your profile will help to set you apart from Social Media's typical (s)trollers.
Wishing you the absolute best, and hoping that this will work out well for your Mom.