I try my best to make healthy and appealing meals for my mother.
1. Come up with meal plan (as she will not provide any input)
2. Shop for food
3. Prepare food
4. Serve meal
5. Listen to complaints about meal
6. Clean up
7 Repeat
I just don't know how to please her and am at the end of my rope - meal wise. If left to her own devices it would be potato chips and doughnuts all day long. Any advice for making this more pleasant? Thanks for letting me vent.
Also not knowing your details, it may be time to celebrate eating and stop worrying about healthy.
People can thrive on all manner of food. Our parents reached old age so there's that.
My mom loves French Fries and ketchup. She can have them every time I see her.
If your mom will eat a sandwich or soup or whatever, and potato chips, then encourage it.
There's a parallel with the pickiness of children's eating habits.
I say choose your battles.
Last thing I'll add is to respond with humor. If mom complains about a meal, I remind her of the time - long ago when she was a wife, mother, full time worker, AND probably going through menopause during a long hot summer - when she served us a supper of cold hot dogs with cold cereal. Dad sternly told my sister and me to eat it and be quiet. THAT always makes her laugh. And she briefly "gets it" so we can move on.
The fights over food may be part of the big picture. She may simply have no appetite. She may just resent how her life has turned out in general and decided to focus on your meals, which I’m sure are very good. Don’t take it personally. Sometimes it’s ok to have a bowl of cereal for dinner...
To improve his calorie intake, I recently bought Benecalorie, a liquid 1.5 oz “food enhancer” with nutrients, protein, and 330 calories. It has a neutral taste, and I’ve started adding it to his food. I also ordered Thrive ice cream, which has extra nutrients. I’ve heard it’s tasty! These are what patients are given in rehab, so I’m hoping it helps. Thrive also has enhanced gelato in different flavors.
There are some nice sweet natural milks that make an awesome milk shake...without the added sugar. I used to add extra protein by using some boost in the shake.
See if there is some other natural sweet things she would like....maybe fresh chopped fruit? Fresh veggies are good too....just chopped not cooked. Cooking veggies changes their taste and texture...reducing the natural sweetness.
By the way, how old is your mother? If she is in her 80's or 90's, she has lived a long life, let her eat what she wants [unless there are sugar limits]. I always say if an elder wants ice cream for breakfast, you ask "one scoop or two?".
Also, as we age, food starts to taste different, the flavor just isn't there as Katie had mentioned earlier. When I did the grocery shopping for my very elderly parents, my Mom also had on the list ice cream, Little Debbie cupcakes, apple pie, Whip-Cream, Pringles, etc. because sweets were pretty much all they could taste.
It's not an easy ride, that's for sure. My mom lives with me and I cook 2 (usually) very healthy, low carb, high nutrient, yummy meals a day for us and my husband. I try to keep it on the paleo side. She's not terribly fussy, so luckily she'll eat most of the things I make without much complaint. She used to say she didn't like the scrambled eggs. We used coconut oil, she wanted butter. Fine. Now they're in butter. We used to make them more omelette style which she didn't like, she wanted them "scrambled" and fluffy. OK, fine. We make them that way and she doesn't complain anymore. About that, anyways. So, I had to drill down to the exact root of that complaint which was pretty easy to resolve. If only other issues were so easy to resolve. It's good for me to remember that!
She "cheats" like heck the rest of the time. Very content eating junk food with no nutritional value. Frustrating since she should lose at least 50 pounds but there's only so much a girl can do.
Good luck. Maybe if you give more details, you can get more specific advice from those in the trenches.
I don't know if a NH wouldn't just let her eat what she wants. Lots of carbs and sugar, so....
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