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My sister and I are giving Dad’s caregiver a Christmas card and would like to put money in it. She has kept us in the loop about the 2nd wife’s negligence and financial abuse and is doing such an incredible job with him. Dad said he is giving her a tip, but we would also like to do something for her and feel money would be more helpful as I’m sure they don’t make a lot. Is this appropriate?

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Yes. It is always appropriate to show your gratitude.

Just do it without an audience and it will be fine.

Edit: give her as much as you can afford. Because you're right, these special people don't make much and a gift of gratitude can take some of the financial burden off them. Which is a special gift to give anyone.
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KT2930 Dec 2022
Thank you. We are giving her $100 and our favorite family treat. I will probably give it to her in a gift bag and present it as just a family treat. Hopefully out of sight of Dad & wife but unfortunately they will probably be around.
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My family lucked out with the two wonderful caregivers that take care of our parents. I can’t sing their praises enough. I gave them each $100 just from me. I told my sisters they should also give them a cash gift.

I didn’t tell my parents I did this because I expect them to give something as well.

Treat them well. if you have good people, you want to keep them.
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If the aide is from an Agency, they may not allow gifts over a certain amount.

Maybe that is why ITRR said ; You can hand it to her and say a gift for under your tree and wink.
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