My father in law goes to the toilet several times a night. Sometimes, after flushing, he gets confused and just sits there for a long time, almost catatonic, until someone comes and talks to him.
He’s in his 70s and has middle stage-dementia (I think Frontal Dementia is what he is suffering from, although it’s hard to know for sure since it’s tied to a brain surgery he had about 15 years ago and the doctors have been hesitant to put a definitive diagnosis).
For over a decade now he would go to the toilet several times per night. His surgery left seriously affected his mobility, but he is still able to walk on his own, albeit slowly. There is a night light near the entrance to the bathroom and he never really misses the way or has any issues actually getting there.
Yet in the last few weeks we are facing this new issue: about once every 2 or 3 nights, immediately after flushing the toilet he would get confused. (He usually turns on the light, but sometimes he uses the toilet in the dark. Regardless, this does not appear to make a difference ). So he just sits there, sometimes silently repeating to himself stuff like “What do I do now”, while others blankly staring at the wall. The moment someone comes and talks to him he makes eye contact and snaps out of it. He then heads back to bed.
Did anyone ever face anything similar? I read a lot all over the internet about old people not being able to find the way to the toilet, but almost nothing about finding the way back. Someone suggested getting a commode. But there is an issue with this as well: he has a night pot that he uses sometimes, but then he decides to go to the bathroom empty it. And once there he might get confused, like I described above.
This is taking a toll on the family, as every time this happens someone has to wake up and bring him back. He is never violent or aggressive and the issue only happens at night. During the day he is still jovial and aware of his surroundings. But he doesn’t seem to remember that these things are happening to him during the night.
So I guess this is a double question: a) Have you been faced with something like this before b) Is there a way to convince a person with dementia to start using a night pot or commode every time if for years their routine has been to go to the toilet?
Cheers and thank you in advance.
You can think about a few ideas now. Hiring a night caregiver to attend to him at home so he's put back to bed safely after using the toilet. Or you can dress him in an anti strip suit with a Depends brief on under it. He'd eliminate into it, removing the need for a toilet or commode entirely. You can search Alzheimer's anti strip suit on Amazon to see what they look like. Or you can try using the pot/commode to see what happens. But its typical for a dementia sufferer to forget the steps involved in doing things, what comes first, second, and so on. Things we take for granted they are lost on.
Best of luck to you
If he needs verbal direction, that's harder.