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She also appears to have burned most of his assets (over 1M) in 8 years. He has advanced Alzheimer’s and needs skilled nursing care but she says there’s “no money left.”
You will need to have rock solid proof that whoever this is, she’s appropriating Dad’s funds. Living in Hawaii isn’t cheap and I can see it costing 1M over 8 years, especially if there’s a big house to care for and all the expenses that come with it, plus whatever caring for Dad costs.
If you have suspicions, get an attorney. POAs are supposed to make their records available to anyone who wants to examine them. I had to.
How long has he been in skilled nursing? Where was he before? One million in eight years? What income is there? If all his income is Social Security there may be no need to file income taxes.
Her job as POA is to keep dad's information private unless the POA or trust states differently. Hawaii is very expensive living. If he had in home care at all over that eight years I would imagine in Hawaii it would cost in the area of $15,000.00 a month, maybe more. Nursing home? Maybe $18,000.00 a month.
Either way with that kind of expense a million could be spent quite easily. My mom had substantial assets and running the math she would have been eligible for Medicaid in roughly seven years. Getting old is very expensive especially if you are sick.
I'm not sure if you could take her to court because she hasn't filed a tax return - you haven't actually sufffered any damage. That's a different matter from questioning her actions under the POA if you think she is stealing money, but as Ahmijoy says you need some evidence before doing that. Perhaps you could contact the tax department, tell them that no return has been filed, and leave it up to them to chase it.
I haven’t suffered any damage - yet. His estate suffers and there are 6 other siblings. Regardless, large sums of money spent from retirement account according to the IRS and nothing to show for it. Penalties etcetera. In-home pro care for the last two years about 6 hours per day. The rest is my brother, myself and my sons. All who have full time jobs. Sis with POA sell real estate but hasn’t sold anything for a looooong time.
1M over 8 years is 125k a year. If he got average SS income, it’s like $150K a yr income to have. As others have posted Hawaii is pretty high cost of living state. It can totally make sense theres no $ in assets now.
Usually DPOA is the elders son or daughter, by choice of the parent. Your dad did NOT choose you as his DPOA. So what’s the backstory on this? And why after 8 years are you now wanting to get involved?
You know the DPOA could well have spent all his $ appropriately as far as Medicaid is concerned & has done this deliberately over time to get him impoverished so he can become eligible for LTC Medicaid.
If SS or federal or RRRB retirement is their income, no need to file taxes. Those are tax exempt income. Any income not tax exempt has to be over a $ amount threshold for taxes to have to be filed. For under 65, the threshold is 12k. For over 65 it’s higher, just what varies by each persons filing.
If this DPOA filed taxes years 1-5 and stopped 3 years ago, I’d bet it’s cause dads $ isn’t requiring taxes filed. DPOA knows their stuff money wise and I’d also bet is methodologically spending down $ to get him impoverished for Medicaid.
If you have issues with how this is being run, then hire an atty for 5-10k or so and go to to court to file for guardianship.
If your father's taxes are due and unpaid, the authority which levies the tax will take him to court quite soon enough, and his POA as his representative will have to explain herself then. In any case I can't really see what this particular issue has to do with you.
Your father's needing care and being unable to pay for it does have something to do with you, because he's your father and you want him to be looked after properly. But it still isn't your responsibility as much as hers. Has she approached you asking for financial support for your father, or something? How have you become involved in the situation?
I took over hands on care for my father 2 years ago when another sibling burned out. Sister with POA was depositing funds in a household account which I wrote checks from for utilities, incontinence supplies, groceries, property taxes and daycare.($3500/mo) There is no mortgage on the house he lives in and his income from a pension and social security is about $3500/mo. Now, because I know he had close to $1M in his IRA when POA was given to my sister, I assumed there would be enough to pay for pro caregivers at home ($6000/mo). I was wrong. He is receiving hospice care at home now but hospice doesn’t pay for caregivers.I work full time and am being told the well has run dry. Go figure. Now I’ve learned his taxes (which POA “took over” from Dad’s accountant) have not been filed in 3 years. Ugh.
You mention in your post that dad needs skilled nursing care. That he lives at home and you help take care of him.
Are other family members also caring for him? Has he had paid caregivers?
As POA does your sister say what her plan is going forward for dad?
It sounds like posters here can understand how the money could have been spent on his care if he was paying for care.
Is sister filing for Medicaid? Is your problem more that you, being a hands on caretaker, see that dad needs skilled nursing now, and sister wants you to continue caring for him?
We need more information to fully understand what is happening.
Your question was can you sue. You can always sue, but to what purpose? It could just be an expensive exercise and meanwhile dad still needs care.
Ask sister if she has filed for Medicaid for father. That might be a better conversation right now since she says there is no more money. Shift your focus.
You may not be privy to what your sister has spent the money on but you have every right to explain that you feel dad needs more care.
The application process for Medicaid will flush out if his funds can’t be accounted for properly. Medicaid will want to review records for the past five years. Get on sisters side and help dad get the care he needs.
Sorry if the info wasn’t complete. The expensive nursing care (at home) began only a year ago. Prior to that another sibling stayed home to care for him. There is no mortgage on the house and he still receive a pension and social security. Apart from utilities, home insurance, property taxes and groceries his health care costs were less than $50.00 per month! Thanks for suggesting the Medicaid question. I will try it.
If withdrawals from his IRA have been made, this probably would have been considered taxable income, and probably have been taxes withheld. So it does seem that yearly income taxes should have been filed. I would talk to an attorney to see if/how records can be accessed.
Your sister with power of attorney has some explaining to do.
When you ask her what has happened to the IRA money, what does she have to say for herself?
A question is not an accusation. You are not accusing her of anything. You are asking her a reasonable question and awaiting a sensible answer, that's all.
What do you know about the "old retainer" accountant? Did sister get rid of him for any particular reason - like his charges, for example, or other concerns about him?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
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I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
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APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
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This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
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You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If you have suspicions, get an attorney. POAs are supposed to make their records available to anyone who wants to examine them. I had to.
Her job as POA is to keep dad's information private unless the POA or trust states differently. Hawaii is very expensive living. If he had in home care at all over that eight years I would imagine in Hawaii it would cost in the area of $15,000.00 a month, maybe more. Nursing home? Maybe $18,000.00 a month.
Either way with that kind of expense a million could be spent quite easily. My mom had substantial assets and running the math she would have been eligible for Medicaid in roughly seven years. Getting old is very expensive especially if you are sick.
Regardless, large sums of money spent from retirement account according to the IRS and nothing to show for it. Penalties etcetera.
In-home pro care for the last two years about 6 hours per day. The rest is my brother, myself and my sons. All who have full time jobs.
Sis with POA sell real estate but hasn’t sold anything for a looooong time.
If he got average SS income, it’s like $150K a yr income to have.
As others have posted Hawaii is pretty high cost of living state.
It can totally make sense theres no $ in assets now.
Usually DPOA is the elders son or daughter, by choice of the parent.
Your dad did NOT choose you as his DPOA.
So what’s the backstory on this?
And why after 8 years are you now wanting to get involved?
You know the DPOA could well have spent all his $ appropriately as far as Medicaid is concerned & has done this deliberately over time to get him impoverished so he can become eligible for LTC Medicaid.
If SS or federal or RRRB retirement is their income, no need to file taxes.
Those are tax exempt income.
Any income not tax exempt has to be over a $ amount threshold for taxes to have to be filed. For under 65, the threshold is 12k.
For over 65 it’s higher, just what varies by each persons filing.
If this DPOA filed taxes years 1-5 and stopped 3 years ago, I’d bet it’s cause dads $ isn’t requiring taxes filed. DPOA knows their stuff money wise and I’d also bet is methodologically spending down $ to get him impoverished for Medicaid.
If you have issues with how this is being run, then hire an atty for 5-10k or so and go to to court to file for guardianship.
Your father's needing care and being unable to pay for it does have something to do with you, because he's your father and you want him to be looked after properly. But it still isn't your responsibility as much as hers. Has she approached you asking for financial support for your father, or something? How have you become involved in the situation?
Sister with POA was depositing funds in a household account which I wrote checks from for utilities, incontinence supplies, groceries, property taxes and daycare.($3500/mo) There is no mortgage on the house he lives in and his income from a pension and social security is about $3500/mo.
Now, because I know he had close to $1M in his IRA when POA was given to my sister, I assumed there would be enough to pay for pro caregivers at home ($6000/mo). I was wrong.
He is receiving hospice care at home now but hospice doesn’t pay for caregivers.I work full time and am being told the well has run dry. Go figure.
Now I’ve learned his taxes (which POA “took over” from Dad’s accountant) have not been filed in 3 years. Ugh.
You mention in your post that dad needs skilled nursing care. That he lives at home and you help take care of him.
Are other family members also caring for him? Has he had paid caregivers?
As POA does your sister say what her plan is going forward for dad?
It sounds like posters here can understand how the money could have been spent on his care if he was paying for care.
Is sister filing for Medicaid? Is your problem more that you, being a hands on caretaker, see that dad needs skilled nursing now, and sister wants you to continue caring for him?
We need more information to fully understand what is happening.
Your question was can you sue. You can always sue, but to what purpose? It could just be an expensive exercise and meanwhile dad still needs care.
Ask sister if she has filed for Medicaid for father. That might be a better conversation right now since she says there is no more money. Shift your focus.
You may not be privy to what your sister has spent the money on but you have every right to explain that you feel dad needs more care.
The application process for Medicaid will flush out if his funds can’t be accounted for properly.
Medicaid will want to review records for the past five years. Get on sisters side and help dad get the care he needs.
Good luck and let us know how things work out.
The expensive nursing care (at home) began only a year ago. Prior to that another sibling stayed home to care for him. There is no mortgage on the house and he still receive a pension and social security. Apart from utilities, home insurance, property taxes and groceries his health care costs were less than $50.00 per month!
Thanks for suggesting the Medicaid question. I will try it.
When you ask her what has happened to the IRA money, what does she have to say for herself?
A question is not an accusation. You are not accusing her of anything. You are asking her a reasonable question and awaiting a sensible answer, that's all.
What do you know about the "old retainer" accountant? Did sister get rid of him for any particular reason - like his charges, for example, or other concerns about him?