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Who are you caring for?
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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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jpl, I see from your profile that your Mom has advanced Alzheimer's/Dementia. Thus with a memory issue I doubt that a person can reason out a staged fall.
Where does Mom live? Is she living under the same roof as you?
If your Mom's memory issues are mild, yes, I believe one can stage a fall to get attention. But that person is taking a risk. Unless you are in another room and Mom carefully gets down on the floor pretending to have fallen, like how dare you leave the room :P
So, unless you catch Mom in the act of arranging herself on the floor, assume every fall was real and not planned. Time for Mom to have a walker.
My mom was constantly staging a fall. She ruck up a rug, smack herself in the arm, whatever it took to make it look real. I don't know why she did this..attention? She really wanted a2nd hip replacement and would "fall" to prove she needed one. Flash fwd to the surgeon telling her she is way too old and wouldn't survive the surgery. Amazing, the falling stopped.
JPL, the word "fall" does have a number of interpretations. My mother denied being a falls risk because:
she had only fallen onto a soft surface she hadn't fallen, she'd just sort of slipped she hadn't broken anything I had come to help her up she always held on to things and, the time she suffered a compound fracture of her right wrist that made my head swim when I saw it, she hadn't fallen, someone had come to the door so she was going to answer it.
So, with your mother, if she'd seated herself on the edge of the bath and then almost imperceptibly slid back and down until she was royally stuck, no part of the process probably felt like falling or, thank God, actually hurt her much.
What about getting a perching stool so that if she needs to rest while she's washing or cleaning her teeth she doesn't sit on the edge of the bathtub?
Sort of...my husband’s grandma had to be the center of attention and would get nasty if she wasn’t. She ‘staged’ a fall to break up our conversation and end our fun. It was the slowest fall I’ve ever seen, it really was comical. She wasn’t injured though she talked like she was....
My mom lives with my sister, but while she's at work I stay with our mother. I do the cooking, give her meals & medicines. She had two identical falls once with my sister & other on my watch. Both taking place in bath tub. Now this lady has not had a bath in 21/2 years because she said she is afraid of falling. Only sponge baths. Both falls where position the same way, body in middle, her back against back of tub, legs swinging over edge, arms laying flat on each side. Really looks as if she was placed there. No pain,no bruises, & ask if she hurt next day said she doesn't remember falling. Told her I was hurting from picking her up and she said "if you say so" I did not fall. Same thing she told my sister when she found her. She has a walker,won't use, except when going out. I know it sounds crazy but I'm confused, I'd think you would remember falling. I want to take a picture if this happens again, if nothing else so she can see it. Am I wrong for doing this?
I am definitely a fall risk and not shy about telling anyone. Had a nasty one last night and have the black eye to prove it. However that being said anything can be staged whether the patient has dementia or not. Even unconsciousness can be faked. I had two patients that did that in an acute medical ward. could not rouse them but i just knew they were not really unconscious. When my son was alittle boy and having some mental health issues he could turn it on and off and nothing you did to him even if painful. We were going to see the child psychiatrist one day and for some reason left him in the car I know it is a no no these days but this was 40 years ago and as we walked back we saw him sitting up in the car but seconds later he was limp and unresponsive. Finally he was about to do it one evening and rather than carry him upstairs and put him to bed hubby yelled at him, told him not to do it and that we had had enough of this and he snapped right out of it and never did it again. Years later when he was all grown up i asked him about it. he remembered he was able to do it but no longer could and didn't remember how to do it. i think there are all kinds of reasons why someone will stage a fall one of which is for attention, another might be because . she likes going to the hospital and being taken care off or it may be drug seeking if she yells loud enough when she gets to the ER. The mother who staged it twice on the edge of the bath tub was certainly running a big risk of getting very seriously injured it is probably some kind of manipulative behavior that can be continued at least through the early stages of dementia. No easy answer but i think it is real.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Where does Mom live? Is she living under the same roof as you?
If your Mom's memory issues are mild, yes, I believe one can stage a fall to get attention. But that person is taking a risk. Unless you are in another room and Mom carefully gets down on the floor pretending to have fallen, like how dare you leave the room :P
So, unless you catch Mom in the act of arranging herself on the floor, assume every fall was real and not planned. Time for Mom to have a walker.
My mom was constantly staging a fall. She ruck up a rug, smack herself in the arm, whatever it took to make it look real. I don't know why she did this..attention? She really wanted a2nd hip replacement and would "fall" to prove she needed one. Flash fwd to the surgeon telling her she is way too old and wouldn't survive the surgery. Amazing, the falling stopped.
she had only fallen onto a soft surface
she hadn't fallen, she'd just sort of slipped
she hadn't broken anything
I had come to help her up
she always held on to things
and, the time she suffered a compound fracture of her right wrist that made my head swim when I saw it, she hadn't fallen, someone had come to the door so she was going to answer it.
So, with your mother, if she'd seated herself on the edge of the bath and then almost imperceptibly slid back and down until she was royally stuck, no part of the process probably felt like falling or, thank God, actually hurt her much.
What about getting a perching stool so that if she needs to rest while she's washing or cleaning her teeth she doesn't sit on the edge of the bathtub?
I did not fall. Same thing she told my sister when she found her.
She has a walker,won't use, except when going out.
I know it sounds crazy but I'm confused, I'd think you would remember falling. I want to take a picture if this happens again, if nothing else so she can see it. Am I wrong for doing this?
However that being said anything can be staged whether the patient has dementia or not. Even unconsciousness can be faked. I had two patients that did that in an acute medical ward. could not rouse them but i just knew they were not really unconscious. When my son was alittle boy and having some mental health issues he could turn it on and off and nothing you did to him even if painful. We were going to see the child psychiatrist one day and for some reason left him in the car I know it is a no no these days but this was 40 years ago and as we walked back we saw him sitting up in the car but seconds later he was limp and unresponsive.
Finally he was about to do it one evening and rather than carry him upstairs and put him to bed hubby yelled at him, told him not to do it and that we had had enough of this and he snapped right out of it and never did it again. Years later when he was all grown up i asked him about it. he remembered he was able to do it but no longer could and didn't remember how to do it.
i think there are all kinds of reasons why someone will stage a fall one of which is for attention, another might be because .
she likes going to the hospital and being taken care off or it may be drug seeking if she yells loud enough when she gets to the ER.
The mother who staged it twice on the edge of the bath tub was certainly running a big risk of getting very seriously injured it is probably some kind of manipulative behavior that can be continued at least through the early stages of dementia. No easy answer but i think it is real.