Any tips on getting someone with Dementia to take a shower?
I help in taking care of my father-in-law with Dementia. Recently we have been having a really hard time getting him to take a shower. We've tried telling him we were going to visit particular family members that we know he enjoys spending time with. Have told him we were going out for dinner and other places. He says pretty much the same thing every time, " I already took a shower today", "I'm tired maybe later", "It's too hot right now", "how many times do you want me to take a shower in a day?", etc. Then when he starts to raise his voice, then we just stop, wait for him to calm down, and ask again. It's going on a week now and everyone is at a loss. I was hoping if someone was going through the same thing had any tips or tricks that helped them out. Thank you in advance.
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The bathroom can be a frightening place. The noise is more because of the small room and the tiles.
Water hitting the upper torso is frightening.
If they are not getting help there is a lot to remember what to do when taking a shower.
the fear of slipping is very real particularly if there are no grab bars.
If you do not have a walk in shower stepping over the tub is a bit risky.
I placed a spare walker in the shower with my Husband (picked it up at a resale shop for about $3.00) That made him more stable. Later I used a shower wheelchair but a shower bench would work. Try to get one with a back so there is support.
If there is no hand shower attachment get one so that he can have some control where the water goes. I always started with my Husbands feet then his back. I would then give the shower hose to him and he would spray his own chest.
Bathing or showering daily is not necessary. If the person is incontinent cleaning thoroughly is important. But a shower or bath 2 or 3 times a week is a good goal. Bed Bath is another option.
One of you may have to actually have to help him while he's in the shower as well, to make him feel more secure. Often times hiring an aide to come assist him, works well too.
And if that doesn't help, then buy some extra large body wipes, and the rinse less shampoo caps, that he can at least use for the time being, or the in-between shower times. I wish you the best.
Another thing, some seniors become claustrophobic when in a shower. Especially if there are glass doors. I know for myself, I need to keep the far door open a couple of feet. Sitting in the tub works but it is a major chore getting in to sit down, and more so trying to get up :P
Then there is the fear of falling. If your love one is using a moisturizing liquid soap and/or hair conditioners, it will make the floor of the tub/shower feel like an ice rink, even with a tub mat inside.
A parent doesn't need to shower daily, twice a week or once a week is good enough, unless they are doing hard labor. If a parent is a Depends wearer, baby wipes work quite well between showers. Recently I found a product called “Water Wipes” in the baby section, quite pleased with the wipes.
As always, if this seems like a new behavior, check for a UTI.