A letter for all of you, from Milan- Italy
Dear all,
this forum has been of great help to me in the past few years, so I felt tonight to give back something that I hope can be useful to all of you watching the news about COVID19.
I'm writing you from Milan, Italy, now in complete lockdown.
Both my mom and I are fine, even if everything feels very unreal; today is the 3rd day we are just at home, without going out even 1 minute. Milan has become a ghost town, everything is closed except food shops and pharmacies. There’s an unreal silence night and day.
It feels like living in a movie, and everything happened so fast that we can’t wrap our minds around it, yet.
Things I wish I knew from the very start.
1. This is NOT just a heavy flue. There’s been a lot confusion in the beginning over here, many people on TV including doctors were saying this was just a heavy flue, so people kept going out and about. The mortality rate we are having in this very moment is 7,16%. It is not as bad as SARS or MERS but it's still more dangerous than a simple flue and it's extremely fast.
2. Despite what the government and many people keep saying, it is not true that just old people die and that they all had underlying conditions: doctors from inside hospitals are telling us that people perfectly healthy and in their 40s arrive in intensive care every day. Please be careful and protect yourself.
3. Plastic gloves make you feel much safer. I have learned from the Chinese to use toothpicks to touch elevators and atm machines buttons. This will save gloves.
3. If you buy a mask, be warned that most of them are not re-usable.
You probably know it already, I didn't. I just had 2 masks and now I feel scared to go out without one. Not a nice feeling.
4. A good mask DOES make a difference; in China many people who didn't catch the virus were the only ones wearing a mask in indoor spaces.
5. The first things that finished in supermarkets over here have been: alcohol, hands disinfectant, gloves, fruit.
6. If you are thinking at home delivery from supermarkets be aware that in an emergency scenario (that hopefully won't happen to any of you) websites will be so overwhelmed by orders that they will stop functioning. It took me 2 days to finally be able to order online and book a delivery slot and by the time I finally managed to make the order many things weren't available anymore. I'm not saying this to scare you, meaning that food is not a problem over here, at all, it's the amount of orders.
7. I didn't realize that the real reason to stock up some food is not that food won't be delivered to supermarkets anymore, is that people will buy the impossible and many things won't be available anymore. So DO stock up some, at least for 2/3 weeks.
8. Another thing I didn't anticipate is that the biggest worry I have at the moment is not catching the virus, or contaging my mother, even if yes, I'm a bit scared; the most preoccupying thing is that all hospitals are completely full, we don’t have a health system at the moment except than for COVID19, and this is something I have never experienced in my whole life.
9. I have put all helpers in holiday leave, a few days before the government ordered the lockdown and prohibition to move from home( which we actually fully share and support); this means that I'm alone with my mom and my cat. The sense of responsability is ten times stronger than normal, and it was already strong. I would say it's almost overwhelming sometime.
10. If you are alone, like I am, get some tranquillizers for bad moments; I have also bought some Rescue Remedy and it's helping me a lot.
11. We are experiencing an AMAZING support system around us; the government suspended all taxes, loans, fines, even parking fees, friends are calling us from all over the world and the international community at large has been so supportive it's really moving us, and all this is so, so important I can't even tell you. We are deeply grateful. We'll win this, all together ! with love
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I hope that you, your mother and your cat find new insights in such close living, that you are able to support each other, and that each of you survive this epidemic and are able to live full and rewarding lives.
Bless you for your presence here. Reading your posts always make me feel better.
prayers to you and your mom as this unfolds. I am in Florida in USA. Liz
Thank you so much for your private message, you are very very kind.
I tried to reply but I seem unable to so I'll reply here, I hope is ok.
We are ok, but yes, I am frightened. I just can't bring my self to think what I should do if one of us gets sick with all the hospitals full. We do have food for another couple of weeks but I'm taking 0 risks now and not going out for any reason. We don't have an aging center here but we have a free emergency pshicologyst that is helping me keeping my sanity via telephone. I'm telling myself that we just have to stay put and be patient and everything will be allright. I don't have a clue what the future will look like and how we'll be able to have a normal life again and when but I guess that everybody in the world is feeling more or less the same. Being able to write here and your kindness are being of great help. Thank you for your prayers I will keep them close in my heart.
Hello from Southern California in the U.S.A.
Sending love and our support, with thanks for sharing.
May God give you strength and peace during this difficult time in Milan.
May you and your family remain well and strong.
Great big warm hug for you from the deserts of Arizona. 🤗
I'm sending positive thoughts to you and your Mother and kitty cat. Please be safe and well. Take care. You're in my prayers.
Lots of hugs!!💗
In our house, we've been in semi self imposed isolation for a few days already. I was only going out to stock up on supplies. I finished that 3 days ago so we've been in full isolation since. No one has left the house since and no one has come in. I just can't risk it with three people over 80 in the house. I'm no spring chicken either. We had some doctors appointments coming up and they thought it would be a good idea to cancel until this is over.
So other than me running out for medications in a couple of weeks, we'll be in the house for the next month. In the US it's impossible to stock up on meds since the insurance companies will not approve anything extra. You have to be within your last few days worth before they will authorize a refill.
It's funny and sad that many Americans didn't really accept this virus was a problem for us too until the NBA cancelled their season. Until then, it was someone else's problem. I think we will find that it's just as bad here as it is everywhere else. We have just been closing our eyes to it by not testing. Now that testing has begun in vain, our numbers will skyrocket. Even with the very limited testing we are doing now, the number of confirmed infected in the US has gone up about 10x in a week.
I wish you well. I hope that for all of us. We are all in this together.
I know what you are saying, and I can imagine how it must feel; we are thinking about this from Europe, we are aware.
But if it can be of any relief and help, the Italian government -as you might have noticed - it's not exactly famous in the world to be especially enlightened and supportive of its citizens, normally. Believe me, our bewilderment about this whole unreal situation includes the surprise to see the amount of extraordinary measures they pull together in just a few days. Everybody agreed on everything, incredible measures were implemented in a matter of hours. We watch TV in the evening in disbelief, thinking "Seriously? So after all this WAS possible!" :)
This is an unprecented situation for most of us at least in the Western World, I have faith that even Trump will be forced to grant you extraordinary things in this moment; I've just read that he approved free testing for example, I really hope also the laws about access to medicines and access to a free health care for everybody will change under this huge pressure. And perhaps a new system will be born out of this drama for all the United States. At least I really, really hope so.
As for perceiving this emergency as "someone else's problem" I guess it's something we are all guilty of, me included; until the end of February I was aware there was a new virus in China, but I didn't spend much time thinking about it. I felt pretty bad about myself in these last few weeks, very selfish. Then I was talking with an emergency pshycologist yesterday at the phone and she told me that this is a normal reaction and somehow healthy too; we can't overload our mind with worry all the time otherwise we wouldn't be able to function when there's an emergency that threatens us personally. It's a coping, survival mechanism.
I think you took a very wise decision to self-isolate ahead of time; we have already proves here in Italy, after a very short time, that isolation is the only thing that really works, at least for now. In the little town where it all started on Feb 21st with case n.1 - a 38 years old man who got infected by a German citizen, apparently - and that has been put almost straight away into a very strict red zone, yesterday the new cases were just 9. It is not finished yet, but they are definitely over the peak.
I think it's also a good idea to cancel all non-super-urgent medical appointments as you did, especially for elderly people; I did the same, we had waited 3 months for my mom's eyes check-up and it was important as she has glaucoma, but I honestly didn't feel like bringing her into a hospital ; this was back on Feb 26 and we didn't know yet what was going to happen in just a couple of weeks, but I'm pretty happy now that we didn't go.
Sending you lots of strenght.
Arwen
with gratitude
Arwen
Thank you for sharing with us. Stay safe.
Yes, of course. Perhaps not the name/link to the forum if possible? Thank you for asking.
Good wishes to you and your mother. I hope you stocked up on lots of good books!
My best wishes to you and mom. Hopefully at the end of this you both are healthy and strong. And with a little luck..... we remember that we are all part of humankind and will care more deeply for one another. Take care.
To the comments complaining that our government was slow to react: Italy has 60+ million people. We have 300+ million citizens in this country. The states each have individual powers. Italy has a single government. The virus is new and no one can know what the trajectory will be until after it's over. There will be profound economic fallout: businesses small and large will die. People will lose jobs. People will not be fully compensated for losses. People may have lasting health effects that are yet unknown from this virus. The US doesn't manufacture much here so we can't just conjure up tests or medications on the turn of a dime. Let's be real. The reason why any health system is easily overwhelmed by this virus is because victims require respirators. Most hospitals only have a few at any given time and not because they're incompetent or cheap -- because that's all they ever need. To those who think "the government should be doing more"... more what? What "support" do you think is realistic? What do you suggest? Everyone is running on all cylinders right now and doing the best they can with what they think they know about this virus. Every day that goes by more is learned or discounted about this illness. You cannot have a country the size of the US, China or other and expect it to work like a well-oiled machine. It doesn't do that even on its best day.
Our federal government just wasn't slow to react, it got in the way. We knew what the trajectory would be. China warned us. Instead of heeding their warning, the government ignored it. Some called it a hoax.
You all have good points, and I do share many things you say.
We have had, and still have, somewhere in us, the same question marks.
Democracies are difficult to rule. And this thing is going super-fast. But even if Italy is one single state, my region - Lombardy - has begged the central government for even more restrictive measures. We still don't understand how a whole country can be in a lockdown, why we've been asked to stay at home, and there are still thousands of people escaping by train, for example, and most likely spreading the virus to all the other regions. Why they didn't stop the trains, or locked the motorways except than for trucks? And why they didn't test more people, even with mild symptoms, like they did in other regions such as Veneto? We don't understand this, in Milan. But we have to fight and find the strength anyway. We are honestly so focused on surviving right now that we can't afford many other thoughts.
Today has been a very difficult day. People requiring intensive care and respirators jumped from an average of 40/45 to 85. In one day, and just in Lombardy. There are 14 places left, and they have already created 400 new places in 3 weeks, just here. I'm not sure I'll be able to read the news tomorrow night, I'm honestly very scared. Every time I hear an ambulance I feel a knot in my stomach. Where will they put people, what will they do? It's just impossible to think about it.
I'm sorry, I really wanted to post something positive but I can't find it in me right now. I'll try again tomorrow. Thank you for being here with me tonight.
In the US they are showing footage of makeshift hospitals in Italy. Cots in warehouses. They had to do the same in China. We should expect that they will have to do the same here in the US. Our hospitals are already full of people with the flu. Even a small number of patients with corona will overwhelm them.
I finally had our food delivered tonight and I didn't know what to do, meaning, am I supposed to wear a mask for respect to the delivery guy, to protect myself, or not? I eventually used it again. From tomorrow I'll do what you are saying, thank you again SO much, I think this can be very useful to many people right now.
So please stop making political comments that do no one any good.
Some like President Trump others don't - WHO CARES! He can't run the entire government solo, if he could why are we paying others? It takes many departments and department heads to make things happen, not everything is the President's fault.
It seemed off, but realizing what EVERYONE IS dealing with.. Everyone needs to be prepared for their needs. My stores are walking distance... and oddly and strangely.. shelves are empty.. Seriously.. no toilet paper, to the point someone on a Hollywood street.. (in the news posted) was dressed in commplete costume, brown of course.. holding up a stack of toilet paper.. $100 per role..." Joke.... but not a joke... All the stores near me.. are out of toilet paper and bottled water.. Doesn't anyone have a STOVE TO BOIL WATER AND STORE IT IN SOME KIND OF CONTAINER OR POT? HOw about baby wipes and the trash can to dispose of baby wipes? Sanitizers.. how about soap to wash hands? Toothpaste? How about baking soda. I can go on.. too tired to think about what I need. Even the shelves last night were completely empty of rice...
I was also told that our L.A. Ports are supposed to shut down...
I was told that back in the Obama presidency... Bird Flu virus struck up.... and a lot of people got sick and died,,,,, far more than what is happening today...without "pandemic" situations out of world control, that produce, meat, etc.. are gone off the shelves of our daily grocery stores... I found one bottle of Tylenol for my aunt...That's all she needs for 30 days...
When I went to a speciality shop for her geriatric staples... They told me I better get a case... the ports may shut down, and we may not get this any more...
SO, IF YOU NEED ADULT DIAPERS, WIPES, DISPOSABLE BED PADS.. do get a case... NO, do not double on it,,, that will cause more issues... some call - hoarding..waiting for the next disaster... but then again... perhaps that may be a smart move or panic move... Don't know... too tired to think about all the scenarios...
I was asked if I was okay.. My family is okay... Yes, It will get worse before it gets better.... The last part of that sentence: IT WILL GET BETTER. IF ONLY WE USE COMMON SENSE AND NOT BE HOARDERS AND PANIC STRICKEN.
Use local farms.. farmers markets.. get fresh what you can, support your local farms, fresh produce, dairies, etc... We have a place nearby we can and trade our home grown produce with others who may have other produce, I haven't been yet, but plan to. That will be fun.
So, please breathe.. use common sense... stay 6 feet away.. do the FLOPPY FEATHER HAND WAVE instead of shaking hands, or doing the elbow touch since everyone sneezes into the crux of their elbows...
FEATHERS ARE LIGHT, AND THIS FLOPPY FEATHER HAND WAVE makes things a little lighter and fun with a little laughter when you try it. :) Completely harmless when you should be a distance of 6 feet away in case someone sneezes.... So, TO YOU: HAPPY FLOPPY FEATHER HAND WAVE :)
from a safe distance of 6 feet. How tall are you?
The hollywood doo doo guy I think was a joke.. but clearly some people are off the radar. glad he was shut down.. Yup people are talking about toilet paper going on the black market..
If that's the case... they can smell me a mile away.. Not falling for that cr p.
butt then again, I have access to a washer n dryer. and detergent and bleach.
Baby wipes? Do they have anti bacterial chemicals? I don't know.. All I know, when I had a baby, I used those while changing the diapers... I think the answer is yes..
Masks, breathe in and out... something may get through the fibers of a mask.. So don't wear the same one too long.
Avoid public restrooms? Think So,,, and don't try to take the toilet paper from out houses or those restrooms... just avoid if possible.
HOw about a little bottle of rubbing alcohol or maybe perfume? Some perfumes may have enough alcohol to disinfect? Not sure... look online.. Bath n Body Works may have a solution.
Another friend went to 99 cent store and stocked up on veggies and meat, and canned veggies.. They do have good produce.. just need to use it quickly.
Thank you for all the tips, very useful.