As many of you know and have followed back in November my
Mother had a horrible fall with a brain bleed.
Back in September I knew her health was starting to decline because of her CHF & diabetes and lack of caring for herself and not taking meds on a regular basis. Mild dementia started popping up in October that I noticed and by end of November after the fall she was in the hospital, acute rehab, subacute, LTC, then back at the hospital. She has declined so much over 4 months. Doctors say end stage dementia, that her new baseline is sleeping with bouts of agitation when awake.
She keeps pulling the IV out that is giving her antibiotics & fluids that she desperately needs. Her swallowing has decreased so much she is barely able to eat & drink. They have recommended not doing a feeding tube and letting my mother go peacefully on palliative care as there is no quality of life. The doctor thinks because her BP is high and without fluids she has about 1-2 weeks however obviously that is just a estimate, she will go when she is ready. I’ve had a rough relationship with her but it’s my mom and I love her & I will truly miss her. Trying to cope with this news and get down from Canada to see her to say my goodbyes...I’m truly not sure how I feel..sad, possibly relieved?
They were wonderful, kept her out of pain and agitation, but yes, I felt relief that her journey was nearly over. My sister in law and I were with her as she took her last breath and although we cried, there was relief on both our parts.
It's okay to feel both sad and relieved. I hope that you get to see her again.
I am sure you weren’t expecting quite that news.
You probably are feeling a lot of mixed emotions which I think are normal.
I am sure you will have lots of tough decisions over the next couple weeks.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Mom as you go through all this.
This will be hard for you, I imagine. Thinking of you and mom. Are they going to bring in hospice? It will help for everyone.