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I have somebody who keeps refusing to go to a nursing home. Now what would be the legal way for her going to a nursing home?
She is completely disabled!

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I am 84 years old completely disabled person's former sister in law. I have power attorney made a few days ago. What is happening for last 4 years is, her kids avoiding to take care their mom and I tried to let them know that their niece found their mom laying in the blood a few times, she kept falling and her niece never report her on falling, when I tried to tell this her kids, they are upset me and they said they don't want to talk discuss about mom's dangerous situation. I only help her once a week and so far I am her the most trusted person. What this old lady telling me is, I will die in my home and never will go nursing home.  Person is completely unable to care for self and in denial to go nursing home. Her niece comes a few times per week and bring food but no care for her other brother comes and check her but no care for her as well. only person who cares her once a week is me. She is swimming in her poop and pee when I come I clean her real good. I am in frozen position. I will report her APS asap but regarding power attorney what I supposed to for her. She had money but she tells that she doesn't have money I can not pay nursing home.
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ExhaustedPiper Jan 2021
Angel, your former sister in law is lucky that you are looking out for her, but this is too much on you to handle alone, and your SIL needs more care than she is getting living at home alone.

I'm glad you are going to call APS. Let us know how that goes.
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Does this person live with others, alone or with you?

Are you their caregiver or a worried bystander?
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Angel1968 Jan 2021
I am 84 years old completely disabled person's former sister in law. I have power attorney made a few days ago. What is happening for last 4 years is, her kids avoiding to take care their mom and I tried to let them know that their niece found their mom laying in the blood a few times, she kept falling and her niece never report her on falling, when I tried to tell this her kids, they are upset me and they said they don't want to talk discuss about mom's dangerous situation. I only help her once a week and so far I am her the most trusted person. What this old lady telling me is, I will die in my home and never will go nursing home. Person is completely unable to care for self and in denial to go nursing home. Her niece comes a few times per week and bring food but no care for her other brother comes and check her but no care for her as well. only person who cares her once a week is me. She is swimming in her poop and pee when I come I clean her real good. I am in frozen position. I will report her APS asap but regarding power attorney what I supposed to for her. She had money but she tells that she doesn't have money I can not pay nursing home. She does not live with anyone
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You can't force anything unless a person is incompetent. To get guardianship that better be proven in court, so you will need documentation. Are you caring for her? Because if you are doing so you are enabling her to put off a decision regarding care. If the person is completely unable to care for self and in denial, call APS.
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You can report her to APS as a vulnerable adult. They will either decide she’s competent and can stay home or they will put her in a nursing home. OR...If you are willing to do so, you can attempt to have her declared mentally incompetent & pursue court-ordered guardianship which would allow you to move her in to a nursing home against her wishes.
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You know, I tried everything under the sun. As long as the person is "competent," you have no recourse except let whatever happens, happen.
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