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My father has Parkinson’s, dementia and my mother is not physically able to continue being his primary caregiver. She does not want to put him in AL, wants to remain in their home yet cost is $11K/month!

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I'm sorry, I went through the same situation, caring for my father with Parkinson's. There was no help except for putting my father on Medicaid and ultimately into a Nursin Home. Parkinson's is an awful disease. It will continue to progress. You need to have an elder law attorney qualify him for Medicaid (if you or the social worker can't do it yourself) and place him in a Nursing Home. It can be done (must be done, how else will your father be taken care of?) He needs a skilled nursing facility, not assisted living.
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There is very little assistance other than Medicaid to assist seniors with their care needs.
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It’s possible that it’s time for you to become the “parent” and discuss with your mother that the time has come for difficult decisions to be made. Express to her that her life choice has made it very difficult for you as you are constantly worrying about their safety and well-being. Something needs to be done. You will have to file for Medicaid. A lien will need to be put on the house and when it’s sold after they pass, the money will go to Medicaid. That way Dad can go to Memory Care. I doubt seriously if there is any help out there. I sent out dozens of applications for aid and was denied every single time. Good luck. I hope you can find a solution.
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