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My mom was diagnosed with severe Dementia. My mom lives with my husband and I . My mom is from Greece . She came from Greece around 1955. She is a US citizen. . I lost my birth Father in 1961. My mom remarried in 1966. My step Father is a WWII veteran . He passed away in 1990. My mom has been awful . Constantly screaming yelling at me. Doesn't want to take her medicine. Complains, she tears things up. (Important papers) she doesn't want to eat . She constantly puts things in wrong places, tearing up Kleenex , loses my keys. The list goes on. She always tells me she wants to go back to Greece. ( she hasn't been there since a 2 week visit in 1968). Tells me she wants to die everyday . She doesn't want to make friends , nor has hobbies nor read. I offer to take her out , I know elderly widowed women that offered to make friends with her. Nothing ! She recently worked with me and my boss had to let her go. Then the hell began! My mom has gotten worse and even more angry. Since she was let go . That's the only thing she liked doing with me. And my boss told me to tell her that she was let go. Even though she only worked 9 hours a week. But it meant a lot to her. But I see my bosses view since we work with children . ( my mom loves kids and would never do any harm with kids). Mom is 87 and is tormenting me now. She has been having anger issues for quite awhile and I am an only child . We can't afford a home for her. Nor she. But my nerves are shot . Waking up is torture . Like this morning she woke up in anger and wouldn't take her medication nor eat. My daughters don't want to come over anymore because of how she acts . I don't know what she will do next ? My question is should I try to get her into medicaid? Since she has anger issues and is tearing up my marriage . My life. I love my mom so much but she is not the same mother I once had ! Help!

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@grandkids...Contact Department of Social Services and ask about Medicaid In home care program. They probably have one, but each state has it's own type of program,some programs pay a family member to take care of a loved one, but pay is may be minimal and depends on number of hours offered to the patient based on her needs. IF your Mum needs constant supervision, then she may get more hours. Good luck.
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My mom was diagnosed Dementia. My mom lives with my husband and our two kids 11 and 8 years old in NJ. My mom was living on her own last year however, we had to move her in with us. I am an only child.
I would like be able to stay home take care of my mom in our home but I would have to quit my job. We need the income.
She recently got a secondary insurance but can I also apply for Medicaid?
Does anyone if Medicaid would pay for me to care for my mom?
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Yes, you must apply for Medicaid, the sooner, the better. It will cover her Nursing home, if you are no longer able to care for her in case she becomes combative. However, she may also get medical and caregiving benefits from the VA (Veterans Administration) as a spouse of a veteran. Please look into it, if you have not already, because it can take ome time for the paperwork to be processed. Medicaid also offers in home long term care but benefits vary by state . this way you may be able to get a caregiver for some hours each day when your mum is alone to stay with her.
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Yes, if she's eligible definitely get her on Medicaid and out of your house! If she's ruining your family life and breaking up your marriage, it's definitely time for her to go for sure. You don't have to live like this because she will definitely be to blame if your marriage breaks up because of her. This is where the resentment will start. Definitely get her on Medicaid if she's eligible. If she's not eligible, use up her money on the nursing home by putting it toward that specific purpose. When the money runs out show automatically qualify for Medicaid and the nursing home should get her Medicaid. If she's being hateful toward others, the nursing home will most likely put her in a private room for the safety of anyone else in that facility. It sounds like she's got more than just dementia, it sounds like it's progressed to end-stage Alzheimer's, because it sounds like she's violent from your description, (and these are just warning signs). When they reach and stage they usually don't have long left. I don't blame anyone who doesn't want to come visit anymore with her there because she's probably wrecking their lives as well as yours. She was probably a nightmare to work with at work, which would be the very reason why they had to let her go despite her enjoying her work. The boss probably didn't have the decency to deal with the firing themselves, which is why the boss left you to be the scapegoat and deliver the bad news yourself. I'm actually surprised she listened to you, because if she were really just a little more stubborn like some people are, she would've most likely wanted to hear it from the boss who hired her. This is why I'm actually surprised she listened to you. Then again, what if the boss already tried to relay the message and she didn't listen? This is another possibility to think about.
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The issue of applying for Medicaid is a financial one - is she qualified for it? What are her financial assets? Check your state's Medicaid website, do some research, and determine if she meets the criteria, and if so, then apply.
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If you would like to place your mom in a nursing home, yes, Medicaid would be the way to go. If you find a facility you like the social worker there will work with you and help you navigate through the Medicaid process.

It sounds like you need some peace.
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