I spoke several times with the speech therapist about taking him off purée food since he was only supposed to be on for a few weeks. After a few months she finally put him on mechanical food after running more tests. He hates it and lost so much weight, he doesn’t eat as much. When I bring him home made food he eats with no problem like he’s starving to death. I told the therapist he wants to be on regular food and he doesn’t want your mechanical food. The therapist gets loud and refuses to take him off. What are our rights? I asked her repeatedly and this time she just came out and treated me like a child and rudely said NO.
By the way mum was an insulin dependent diabetic, but I kept her sugars in perfect control even with all of those sweets.
You could ask for another Therapist and another evaluation.
The fact that it seems she is not communicating the why's to you would be enough to request another.
I have to say though she may be erring on the side of caution it is very easy for someone to aspirate and it can happen so fast. And this could happen with any food type at any time.
Looking at your profile there does not seem like there would be anything that would indicate he needs mechanical or pureed food. Did something occur that started this?
If he is not of sound mind and you or a family member have medical POA, then you can make the decision for him. Again, signing a waiver.
But the first thing you may want to do is talk with the DON regarding your concerns about your father's weight. He can't improve physically if he's not well nourished.
Then ask for a video swallow study if one hasn't been done recently. This way you'll have objective results to be able to make an informed decision about what food texture and liquid thickness is safest for your father right now.
Finally, ask for a different speech therapist if there is more that one on staff at the facility. There's no need to have to tolerate her attitude. If they can't change therapists, then tell her directly that you don't like her attitude and that it needs to change.
She seems to have NO people skills, but she might be right. Refer the matter to his physician.
The physician may agree with her, but at least she will (hopefully) explain why pureed food might be necessary. Tell her how you’ve seen him eat at home, and see what she makes of that.
People are afraid of lawsuits but the therapist has no right to speak to you like that. Ugh. Wounded healers.
Let me know how you make out ... Bob ( Balanced Way Nutrition)
If someone cannot swallow properly, there is an increased risk of pneumonia. Swallowed food needs to channel to the stomach, not the lungs. When someone cannot chew or swallow properly, the food or liquid may go into the lungs rather than the stomach.
Talk to the therapist and ask why he / she says no and go from there. I would imagine they have the best interests of the patient at heart. If not, talk to the nurse, nurse manager, and find out what you need to know.
As a retired lawyer, I’m aware that rights are NEVER irrelevant, especially when the family is left to deal with the results of high-handed “carers” who give them no idea of why their loved ones are being subjected to what looks like uncaring behavior. I do know that care facilities sometimes seem to be more concerned with CYA than with excellent patient care.
Ask to meet with the DON and review his medication lists, and ask what the purpose of each med is. Then research them, and if necessary, ask for another meeting and find out why they're medicating him with drugs that you find questionable, or don't understand.
The online PDR is a good source for medication information. It used to be the Bible for us in med malpractice cases.
If you're questioned by staff, make it clear, pleasantly, that you want to be a partner in his care and feel it's important for you to know why he's getting the meds they've decided on.
I've had to do this on literally every rehab placement, and often advised that my father did NOT need a specific med. It was pathetic how the records became so botched up when my father was transferred from the hospital.
The fact that your father is sitting up in a wheelchair is PROGRESS!! Cherish that, and work towards the next step, with the staff.
I think it would help to change the dynamics of the staff relationship. While I don't know the situation, what I would do is ask for a meeting of the DON (Director of Nursing), activities director, chef (or head cook), and others involved with his care.
Turn them to your side: explain your concern about his outlook, WITHOUT PLACING ANY BLAME, and ask how the staff and you can work together for his benefit. This is appropriate to eliminate any hostility that's arisen in the past.
If you find that repugnant, think of it as a conquest, as a problem solving method that would hopefully lead to a better situation for your father, and make it a high priority goal.
Ask for their suggestions, but offer your own, and in fact do that so that they can feel as if they're providing valuable and legitimate answers (which hopefully they will do.) If he doesn't go to activities, take him, stay with him and help him if necessary. (Hopefully they'll be interesting activities and not just bingo.) But get him out of his room; it's depressing to be in the same room for days.
And take him to any concerts or music presentations. These kinds of activities, plus interaction with others, can be and are considered therapeutic in some circles.
What else did he enjoy before becoming ill? Let us know, please. There are a lot of creative people here who can offer adaptations on his interests.
Take him on a wheelchair tour of the facility. One of the ones I found for my father had a lovely lounge with a massive fireplace; the décor was that of a lodge in the woods someplace. It was soothing, and we both enjoyed just sitting there, relaxing.
If he reads, take him to the facility library and help him select books to read.
In other words, whatever his interests are, try to find a way to pursue them there, or bring activities to him. Redirect his thoughts toward concentration and away from his unhappy state.
I doubt if the staff would be frank and blunt and tell you they can't or won't work with you, but if they do, you might consider just expressing your disappointment in the management, and hope that they reconsider.
Your goal is to improve life and conditions for your father, and if it means compromising your attitude and applauding those who can create this change, do it. You'll feel better about yourself, and will have the knowledge that you've overcome such obstacles by not only taking matters into your own hands, but by bringing them on board to help you in your goals... and using tact to do it.
That should make anyone feel great!
Then, if they won't cooperate, in the meantime, begin looking at other facilities in the area. Check out the nonprofits; I've found them to be of higher quality and more professional as well as sympathetic to patients.
Good luck, but first, please tell us what your father's interests are so the direction of this thread can be directed toward activities and away from dysphagia limitations.
So I tried to think about ways you could cope with and adapt to the situation, but also offer support to you. Others have shared what they've done. Despite the unattractiveness of mushy mood, there are chef style ways to make it more appealing. And the appearance of food can lessen the repugnance of eating what could be called mush.
1. Check out some of these websites with basic information on the levels of dysphagia, so that you can be prepared if he needs more selective foods. But there are also suggestions on appealing dysphagia food.
https://www.fairview.org/patient-education/90424 (basic levels of diets)
https://www.google.com/search?q=dysphagia,+making+food+appealing&tbm=isch&source=univ&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwipz47TpobmAhVWsZ4KHdBgACoQsAR6BAgIEAE&biw=1280&bih=537#spf=1574717521492 (I think this is one of the best collections of hits).
Look at the third photo in the second row in the URL above and see how the presentation makes the food more appealing. These foods don't appear to all be pureed, but the use of kitchen tools to create mounds and swirls does make the food appear to be more palatable. This is one way to "decorate" and shape mushy foods.
E.g., for something like jello, I would use cookie cutters to cut out pleasant shapes, perhaps Christmas symbols such as wreaths, a santa, reindeer, etc.
I think if the food looked pleasant, it might be more edible and your father might not resist it so much.
There are more hits, but I think the following ones might not be as helpful.
https://dinerwearadultbibs.com/making-dysphagia-food-appealing/
https://kitchenheat.ca/dressing-up-dysphagia-diets/ (some type of machine makes "squiggles" in food, and to me makes it a bit more interesting than a pile of mush).
https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2018/05/15/609389349/gels-foams-and-purees-cookbooks-serve-up-recipes-for-those-who-struggle-to-swall (interesting adaptations and "presentation" of food).
The fact that your father is sitting up in a wheelchair is progress!! Cherish that, and work towards the next step, with the staff.
I think it would help to change the dynamics of the staff relationship. While I don't know the situation, what I would do is ask for a meeting of the DON, activities director, chef (or head cook), and others involved with his care.
Turn them to your side: explain your concern about his outlook, WITHOUT PLACING ANY BLAME, and ask how the staff and you can work together for his benefit. This is appropriate to eliminate any hostility that's arisen in the past.
Ask for their suggestions, but offer your own, and in fact do that so that they can feel as if they're providing valuable and legitimate answers (which hopefully they will do.) If he doesn't go to activities, take him, stay with him and help him if necessary. (Hopefully they'll be interesting activities and not just bingo.) But get him out of his room; it's depressing to be in the same room for days.
Take him on a wheelchair tour of the facility. One of the ones I found for my father had a lovely lounge with a massive fireplace; the décor was that of a lodge in the woods someplace. It was soothing, and we both enjoyed just sitting there.
If he reads, take him to the facility library and help him select books to read. In other words, whatever his interests are, try to find a way to pursue them there, or bring activities to him. Redirect his thoughts toward concentration and away from his unhappy state.
(I'm continuing this separately as I'm running out of space.)
what type of specialist would give a swallow evaluation?
thanks!
I guess you have the 'right' to feed your loved one whatever you'd like, but if something terrible happens, you might regret it. Being ill is not easy and eating foods that we don't often like are part of a painful and frustrating recovery process that can be even more difficult.
Best of luck!
My mom was on a pureed diet with honey thickened fluids and that was indeed appropriate most of the time, but she was also perfectly capable of eating a cracker with her soup or enjoying a potato chip or two, there were also days when she choked on her honey thickened beverages and I got push back when I asked for extra thickener. The core problem as I saw it is that once a care plan is put in place there is no room for flexibility - it is an unfortunate reality of institutional life that there is just not enough time or manpower to constantly adjust the meal plan multiple times a day for multiple residents, so erring on the side of caution is always the default. As long as I was there with my mom I was allowed (reluctantly) to over ride the diet plan as I saw fit, but I had to bow to that reality when I was not.
Do continue to bring your father treats he can enjoy while you supervise him but allow the facility to have it's way when you aren't able to, during mom's time in NH I watched many people struggle and fail to eat the normal diets that their families insisted on. And consider this - sometimes it's not so much the texture but the whole menu that is the major stumbling block, and there's no getting around that.
I'm popping back to add a comment about the weight loss - what are they doing to address that? Have they included high calorie supplements in his diet plan?