She has no guardianship. Will not allow my Mom to visit/home. I filed for petition of guardianship for my Mom but my sister has POA with a forged signature and the nursing home will not allow my mother to visit me or for me to take her home with me without her approval. She's been in the nursing home since October 2014 because my sister's place of residence was closed down by the city - inhabitable. I lost the petition due to a forged POA that was ruled valid. I am appealing, .but how do I get my mother home as bed locks have been left off of her bed, under staffed, no therapy with stroke, mother losing weight rapidly, and osteoarthritis? She's 86 with good vitals.but she is wheel chair bound but refused access to the city or myself...holding her against her will.
Have you actually investigated "in-home care?" It is often a revolving door of unreliable home health aides. What is your "contingency" plan when they "call in" or just don't bother to show up? Are you willing to diaper her and clean up her feces as the dementia progresses? What will you do when she enters the "violent" stage of the disease?
I recommend thinking the situation through thoroughly and avoid making a decision based on "emotional" reasons.
I found out how genuinely harmful bedrest is to the elderly by seeing my father all but destroyed on 9 weeks of bedrest, engineered and maintained by my sister, using a revoked power of attorney. She despises him and wanted him out of our mother's life for as long as possible because he'd become incredibly irritable and demanding.
I also wonder why so many answers doubt that it is possible to want to care for your parents out a respect and reciprocity for all they invested in you. I'll move mountains to keep my parents in their own home and am ready to sue my siblings if they try to have them removed. I put myself in their place, imagine being forcefyulluq removed from a home I've loved for 60 years and taken to a) jail b) the zoo c) a dystopian nightmare d) all of the above, known as a nursing home. The feeling would be terror, and terror is not tolerated in the new place.
my dad's grandson basically had the same attitude but after basically doing that to keep my dad out of a nursing home, after 2 yrs. it was just about too much
Unfortunately, things aren't always what they seem when someone posts. (Please don't take offense to that - but those of us that have been here for several years have seen this happen before.)