My wife has advanced AD. I am 72 and her sole caregiver at home. I have her on an alternating pressure mattress for most of the day and on a wheelchair with a Roho Mosaic Seat Cushion when she's not too tired to sit for a while. I have her wearing pull-up briefs with booster pads for occasional incontinence because she's able to stand long enough for me to put them on. I have washable absorbent pads on her bed for occasional leaks. Her speech is unintelligible due to aphasia and she's not able to follow instructions. Because she can't tell me she needs to go to the bathroom and there are no other cues, how often should I help her to the bathroom? Also, how do you tell if a brief is soiled and needs to be changed? I am physically able to help her and mentally determined. I just need to learn more about how.
Because she is able to walk, it is very good for her body to still move. I did the same with my Dad, I used the pull ons with a booster pad. If in the bed, you can tear the sides of the pull ons, but it is easier to do I. The bathroom. Do you think if you gave her a small bell to ring, that she would be able to ring that to let you know she needs to use the bathroom? Just an idea. I gave my Dad a bell to ring for any reason during the day or night. I was almost always in the same room, but if I was putting laundry away or in the bathroom myself, he had the bell to alert me that he needed something. My Dad did not always talk as much as he used to, but was able to talk. I am sure it is difficult not to be able to communicate like before, but she is in there, the same wonderful woman you married and love. Maybe you can listen to music together, tv, read to her, and the walking to the bathroom every 2-3 hours is a little bit of exercise. It is better for her to have that movement. Even some chair exercises or bed movement is better than nothing. I am hopeful that you can hire some help to come in and help YOU! No matter how much you love someone, the constant caregiving can lead to exhaustion and burnout. The best way to avoid this, is to accept any help from family, friends, neighbors, or hired help. Help with inside & outside chores, food shopping or prep., laundry… etc… God bless you!
I wish you the best!
🙏❤️ 🍀
Since she cannot communicate when she needs the bathroom, keeping a simple log for several days may help you identify her usual pattern and build a regular toileting routine around it. Briefs should be checked frequently and changed promptly when wet or soiled, with careful skin checks and a moisture-barrier product recommended by her healthcare provider.
A home visit from an occupational therapist, continence nurse, or wound-care nurse could be especially useful—not to replace you, but to show you safer transfers, positioning, brief changes, and ways to protect both her skin and your back.
You should also be able to smell if her brief is soiled enough to have to change, or even feel the front of it to feel it's very warm from the pee, just like you would with a little one still wearing diapers. But if you're taking her to the bathroom every 2 hours you most likely won't have to change her very often, except once or twice a day like you would your underwear.
And might I also suggest that if the walk to the bathroom gets to be too much for your wife, you may want to invest in a bedside commode that you can keep next to her bed, or chair where she sits.
Bless you for being there for your wife when she needs you the most.
The briefs will appear yellowish on the inside and feel heavier, depending on how much urine. If it's easier, consider tab-style disposables.