I have 8 hour shifts w/caregivers for my Mom. Mom naps a lot. My Mom has Alzheimer's (approaching middle stage). Memory issues affect her ability to prepare food. When I can't care for her (I'm the daughter), we have an agency provide caregivers in 8 hour shifts, 11am-7pm to cover meal issues. The rest of the time Mom does a few household tasks and naps a lot. Sometimes she wants help w/chores, sometimes not. She does need some help. But in an 8 hour shift, 7 days a week there is only so much cleaning a person can do. When she's awake they are active with her (we have watchful neighbors). My Mom also gets upset if they disturb her by doing things while she's asleep. I drop in unannounced a lot to check on her. We have 2-3 regular caregivers. I have found all at one time or another asleep in the same room as my Mom, while she napped. She generally sleeps soundly. Sometimes she talks about them sleeping and it bothers her. My gut reaction is anger, but I've slept while Mom napped. Should I be upset? Should I talk to them? Talk to the agency? I like the agency and caregivers. We have had consistency, no theft, no abuse, active participation to keep my Mom active. Confused, frustrated, and maybe a bit guilty. Please give me some guidance
On one such occasion, I stayed over at the home sure enough, the night nurse was in Pat's room.... When I awoke to the sound of Pat's walker in the hall!
Now, I'm in the Living room of my own ALF home, so I'm comfortable. The nurse is being paid more per hour by far than I make as the owner, by the Hospice agency/Medicare, and she is the Night nurse, supposedly there to Watch Over the patient, take notes, be there Whatever she needs. Pat's no shrinking violet, so knowing her, I imagine she did call out to the lady before getting up and going on her own to the bathroom next to her bedroom.
I immediately knew the sound of Pat's walker and her labored breathing and I Ran down the hall.
Smiling, I put my arm around my dear friend's shoulder, and said, "You should call the nurse, that's what she's there for, but let me help you." Then I paused long enough to identify the sound of loud snoring from the room...
Pat shook her silver curls, smiled back at me, "Bless your heart, sweetie, you know me... I practically hollered at that woman, but she's out cold." After I got Pat seated on the commode, I said, "I'll give you a minute, while I go apply cold water", which brought a chuckle. Shaking her head, Pat murmured, "Honey, you know you're All Bark and No Bite!"
I went into the room and here was the nurse in the comfy recliner, light on, mouth open, snoring loudly. "Miss!, Excuse me, Hello, Nurse!" I too practically shouted at this woman, and she slept on. Finally I shook her knee, no response and again both called out to her And shook her knee. She sat up and said, "Oh, she's ok, she's asleep..." Her gaze shifted to the bed, and she said, "Oh, where is she?! She crept out silently." Sure she did....
I didn't scold but said I thought the agency told me the night person would be awake. The next day I called them and said please do not send back the person from last night.
And as for anyone not being conscious, I always watch what is said in their proximity. I've seen many an agency caregiver and even nurses, talking about a person with dementia right in front of them, and that's rude.
I agree with those who say the caregiver there only 8 hours, should probably do some quiet chores in another room, or at least put music on to soothe your mom (music does So Much for those with dementia/Alzheimer's) and if she is there with mom, and it's boring, do bring a book, pay bills on her laptop, whatever it takes to while away time if she can't be productive during that time.
That's what I'd do
When I do get really tired and need to sleep, I do a power nap. I even have my cell phones set to ring for 15 minutes later. That's a short enough nap to prevent me from going into deep sleep but enough time time to energize me.
I believe that unless an aide asks for permission up front that naps be allowed that an aide should not just assume it's ok. They are getting paid to do a job. They should consider themselves lucky that they may have some downtime to use smartphone to take care of personal business, or sewing, pleasure reading, ect.
That time of night can be difficult for an Aide who doesn't do night shift on a regular basis. When my Dad had overnight shift, these caregivers only did overnight shifts, no days shifts, so they got their 8 hours of sleep prior to coming to the house.
You should probably talk with the caregivers. When my mother was recovering from surgery, one of her favorite caregivers would come work at night, then go to her full time job during the day at a company. The caregiver would sleep in the rocking chair next to mom's bed with her legs up in such a way that mom could not go anywhere without waking her up. That way she could make sure that mom did not fall or put too much weight on her recovering hip.
You need some reassurance that the caregivers have a plan for how to be awakened when your mother is up. That could be anything from having your mother wake them up if she is alert, to having a motion sensor beep if your mother gets up. There are also pressure sensor pads that will sound if they sense the person has gotten up. Talk to your caregivers and work out what would be the best solution for all involved to make certain that your mom's caregivers get up when she does.
You’ve said you like the caregivers they don’t steal, they are kind and take care of your mom well, etc.
People get tired!
My patient didn't sleep all night (again) and fell asleep 1 hour after my shift started. I got him fed, sheets changed, teeth brushed and pottied before he drifted off.
It is permitted that I can use my phone while I sit in the darkened room. (If not, I'd go nuts!) When I notice I'm getting heavy eyed, I get up, use the bathroom, read by flashlight, do deep breathing, exercise quietly in the room, ANYTHING to keep from sleeping. If the house gets too warm, I'll have a big cold drink and wash my face and hands with cold water.
I'm being paid to stay awake. I can hear (from his breathing) if he's going into a seizure. (90% of his seizures are during his sleep). If I was asleep, I wouldn't catch it. How would that be to wake up to a gran mal seizure?
Falling asleep is punishable by a warning then by termination.
This is a good job (unlike a lot that I've tried out there) and I don't want to screw it up.
I go to bed at 9 pm and get up at 5 am. No reason to sleep.
Plus, I get to read all the AC responses at work ! 😀
Guess I could have read the weekly hometown newspaper that was mailed to Dad, to catch up with the farming reports, that would take 10 minutes.
Couldn't do any housecleaning as I didn't want to wake Dad. So I quietly turned on the TV and scrolled through all 6 channels on the TV. Oh, Dad didn't have cable, either. Eventually I found something to keep me awake for awhile.
Eventually i did doze off. One just can't help it, unless one was a night caregiver who has a chance to sleep 8 hours during the day. Plus the house was sooo hot.
Two tips.
Cameras and cell phones.
With cameras you can check in anytime.
Since the cameras are visible to all ( in my case) they are a deterrent on their own for any no no’s. No one can tell when you are checking.
The cell phone is useful for two different reasons.
One is that you can check the cameras via the cell phone regardless of where you are.
The second use for the cell phone is for the sleepy person. If feeling sleepy simply read a few minutes on the phone and the light of the phone will help wake one up and make one more alert.
That’s the same reason one shouldn’t be on the cell phone before going to sleep at night.
Good for waking up. Bad for going to sleep.